I’ve spent my life among followers of Jesus. And here’s what I’ve seen: they struggle. They lie. They battle temptation. They wrestle with anger, pride, anxiety, and judgment. At times, they can be unkind and unloving. It’s all true.

But that’s precisely why they follow Jesus, not because they are perfect, but because they know they are not. They are people who know they need grace, forgiveness, and transformation.

If someone were truly “good” on their own, they wouldn’t need a Savior.

But broken people? We need everything Jesus offers.

How has our faith in Jesus truly changed the way we live?

What have we willingly given up for the sake of God’s Kingdom? Our Sunday mornings? Our time? Our Finances? Our possessions? Our energy?

If our lives mirror those who don’t know Christ, perhaps it’s time to ask if we’re truly walking as closely with Jesus as He desires.

Television and movies shaped my expectations of life. I learned to crave conflicts wrapped up in thirty minutes or two hours, complete with clear obstacles, satisfying victories, and tidy moral lessons. Entertainment taught me that every story should have a beginning, middle, and definitive end.

Real-life refuses to follow this script. Most of our stories remain unfinished, their pages still being written with divine guidance. We stumble through seasons of learning and transformation, wrestling with change, pursuing growth, but without the luxury of rolling credits when we’ve learned our lesson. Some struggles persist for years while we resist God’s direction, postpone difficult decisions, and cling stubbornly to familiar patterns.

I recognize this truth in my own unfinished narrative. When I meet someone new, I try to remember that their story, like mine, is incomplete and lacks a final chapter. They won’t often experience instant breakthroughs or sudden enlightenment during their spiritual journey. Their character development happens gradually, imperfectly, and authentically.

Perhaps the most meaningful gift we can offer each other is patience. To give the grace to let people continue writing their stories without our commentary or critique interrupting their process.

One tension in the Church community is how to treat the new people that attend.

Should we almost force them to give us their information so that we can send them nice messages with information about the Church? That way, we can invite them to events and ensure they feel welcome.

The problem is that most people are not coerced into faith and quit if they feel pressured.

Should we do nothing that even suggests we are forcing them to provide us with information against their will? We don’t want to come off as a pushy marketer of the Church, so we will allow people to remain anonymous.

The problem is that many people end up feeling ignored and quit because no one cares.

How does the Church community find a middle ground in this issue? I lean toward ignoring while really wanting to badger. No method or approach is 100% effective, but the best thing I have found is not a program at all. It is every person being genuinely friendly to every other person who attends every worship program. The bridge between badgering and ignoring is you.

Because of my current sermon series on manhood, I have been reading numerous articles and books on the topic of men’s ministry. Here are some random thoughts I am trying to process.

“Men follow men, and not programs.” – Don Wilson

“Women want a relationship, men want adventure.” – Don Wilson

“My second biggest takeaway for men: Don’t watch pornography.” – Anne Kennedy

“The old advice to men who feel neglected and are dissatisfied is ‘Man Up’… and that is not helpful. We need to show men how to man up.” – Roger Olson

“I would tell men in a membership class: If you join the Church, you will be betrayed. And your betrayer will be a fellow Church member… most will be small, but after each, you will be tempted to quit … remember almost everyone in the Bible was betrayed.” – David Murrow

“As I surveyed the lineage of Godly men, I honestly wondered how many saints of old would feel discomfort with the feminization, not only of our society but also in some of our Churches.
Would we emasculate men of old? Would we chide Abraham for wandering, Jacob for wrestling, Joshua for fighting, Elijah for mocking, Noah for madness, Job for arrogance, David for incivility, Nehemiah for violence, Nathan for high-handedness, John the Baptist for name calling, Paul for divisiveness, and the Son of God for brandishing a whip and a turning over tables at the temple?
Have we chosen the conveniences of niceness over the discomforts of godliness? I fear someday lying comfortably beneath the inscription, ‘Here lies a father, husband, churchgoer – just a really nice guy.’
‘Nice’ says nothing of spine, of edge, of valor, and thus, it can say little of righteousness or purpose. Nice requires no courage, no conviction, and no willingness to make enemies with the wicked. Jesus warns against palatability: Woe to you, when all people speak well of you, for so their fathers did to the false prophets” (Luke 6:26)” – Greg Morse

When you attended worship yesterday, what did you think you would encounter?

Did you think it would be boring, outdated, and irrelevant?

Did you expect people to be mean, distant, and judgmental?

Did you expect the songs and sermons to be a blessing to your life?

Did you look forward to seeing people and sharing your life with them?

Here is what I know about people. What you discovered during your time of worship at Church was precisely what you expected you would find.

Things are rarely different than our expectations because we find exactly what we are looking for.

Twelve men go in to explore the Promised Land on behalf of Israel. They were given a specific set of questions to answer and then report back to Moses. They travel in and gather information, but when they return, they do not just report the facts; they provide their interpretation of the situation.

Ten of them say that the people are big and strong and the Israelites will look like bugs in their eyes. They will be seen as tiny intrusions that need to be squished.

Only two men believe that God can handle the armies and give them the land. One is named Joshua, and the other is Caleb. Joshua will lead the people after Moses, and we know a great deal about his life. Caleb, we know much less, but an essential description of him emerges as the story unfolds. “Because my servant Caleb has a different spirit and follows me wholeheartedly, I will bring him into the land he went to, and his descendants will inherit it” (Numbers 14:24). He is described as a man who followed God “wholeheartedly.” He is also described in this manner in Numbers 32:11 and 12, Deuteronomy 1:16, and Joshua 14:14.

One characteristic of a believer that God desires is that they follow him “wholeheartedly.” That means they have a complete and total commitment to him.

The opposite is a divided heart. Psalm 86 has a title over it that says, “A Prayer of David.” In this prayer, he asks God to change his heart. “Teach me your way, Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.” (Psalm 86:11)

Behind these passages is a single idea: We are to give ourselves entirely to the Lord and his will. One goal of a believer is to spend their life removing the distractions that keep them from total devotion to God. Instead of being pulled in multiple directions, every day is given to a singular task: living a life that is pleasing to God.

“Lord, help me to have an undivided heart so that I might follow you wholeheartedly.”

I recently read an interview with a popular Christian musician. In it, he said some things that sent commentators into a frenzy. It was nothing overly provocative, as he stated that he was writing songs with less Bible and more modern language to reach non-Christians with the message of Jesus. The primary concern was that some of his music is being used as worship music in certain Church settings. The people of God need more Bible and not less.

As I read the article, I couldn’t help but think, ‘This guy is barely thirty years old.’ He is a songwriter whose music has become popular, but he claims no formal theological training. He is learning and growing (as best I can tell), while trying to produce songs that people like. He is young and inexperienced in life, faith, and the Church.

Why do I make this excuse for him? Because I was once a preacher in my early thirties. And when I revisit my old sermons, writings, and lesson materials, I am embarrassed.

In the years between then and now, I have probably read more than 250 books, spoken to hundreds of Christians, attended classes with professors, listened to podcasts and videos from some of the world’s most excellent teachers, and, most importantly, read the Bible more than 20 times. I believe I have grown significantly as a Christian and leader since those days.

One piece of wisdom I have learned over the years is to show an enormous amount of grace to those who are younger than me and to respect those who are older than me. Sometimes, people’s greatest error is that they are young and naïve, but I know that with perseverance, wisdom will come with age.   

I have been preaching for over 32 years and writing for about 20 years.

Listening to old sermons and reading old posts can be a painful experience.

Every year, I learn new things about my craft, myself, Jesus, and others. These lessons, no matter how small, make an impact on the things I communicate.

For example, over the past year, I have kept reminding myself to ensure that every sermon is not only informative but also helpful to the people who listen. I also keep telling myself to be more positive in what I say. In old sermons, I feel like I’m telling people about God without telling them how to know Him. I think I often sound angry and impersonal in what I preach. So, I am adjusting to improve my content and delivery.

One truth that all Christians must embrace is the call to continue learning, growing, and changing in the way we do ministry, especially in the way we do ministry. If you have been teaching children for years, there are still things to learn to improve your teaching. If you lead small groups, there are ways to improve that will lead to greater connection. If you are a greeter, there are ways you can be more personable and welcoming. Whatever ministry you do, there are steps you can take to improve and have more significant results for the kingdom of God.

Apathy and acceptance are the keys to mediocre ministry. Perhaps it is time to relight the fire in your soul so that other souls may know Jesus.

They were angry and mean to me. I could not recall anything I had specifically done to generate this attitude toward me. In fact, if you asked them on Sunday morning, “How are you today?” I am sure they would have responded with, “I’m fine.”

They were clearly not fine.

Was it because of me, or was I merely the recipient because of my proximity?

What happens when the hurt we’ve buried deep starts to seep out into our actions, our attitudes, and our relationships?

Internal wounds, whether they come from betrayal, disappointment, grief, or shame, don’t stay hidden forever. Left unaddressed, they begin to manifest in subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) ways: a short temper, isolating ourselves, cynicism, or even physical symptoms. One wise Christian told me, “We often externally manifest our internal hurts.”

As followers of Jesus, we must address the pains we feel deep inside if we wish to have genuine relationships and authentic community. Instead of ignoring our pain, we can bring it into the light. Talk to God honestly. Invite wise, godly friends or a counselor into the process. As we allow God to heal what’s going on inside, we’ll begin to see new life bear fruit on the outside.

Letting your hurt be visible isn’t a sign of weakness; it can be the beginning of healing, transformation, and a testimony of God’s grace at work.