The phrase “wishy washy” has been around since the early 1600s, when the word washy simply meant diluted or weak. Before long, English speakers added “wishy” to it as a rhythmic way to drive the point home. The phrase means something feeble, flimsy, and lacking substance. Over time, it grew beyond describing watered-down items and began to describe people’s character, choices, and commitments. Webster’s dictionary defines it as “ineffectual” and “weak.”

I hadn’t heard the phrase in a while until a friend recently used it to describe some of the people he manages. He had hired folks who just couldn’t, or wouldn’t, follow through on what was asked of them. He shook his head and said, “Everyone is so wishy washy.”

It stopped me in my tracks. Because my mind went straight to the people I lead. Are they standing firm in their faith, or are they wishy washy? When God asks something hard of them, something costly, something uncomfortable, do they rise to meet it, or do they do it half-heartedly?

And honestly, this is a hard question for all of us who follow Jesus. He doesn’t call his people to be lukewarm. In Revelation 3, he tells the Church at Laodicea that he would rather they be hot or cold, because he will cast them out like a person drinking lukewarm water. He doesn’t ask for halfway obedience or part-time devotion. Jesus wants all of us.

Wishy washy faith isn’t neutral ground. It’s a warning sign. So let’s examine our hearts honestly and ask: are we all in, or are we wishy washy?

I was listening to a missionary from the Philippines talk about the differences in ministry between that culture and the American worldview. He described how, when people come over on missions trips, they usually have two points of emphasis: projects and performance. They want to know what we can do to help these people physically, or what kind of program we can put on to help people know Jesus.

Then he said something like this, “In most of the places where I serve, they are only interested in knowing you. The way they see it, they have all the time in the world to do that thing, but you might only be there once in your life, and they want to know you.”

As an American writing this, I must admit that it is true for me. I want to get things done. But the call of Jesus is to value people and relationships as we do his work. We are to do his work, and we must never lose sight of the fact that we are doing it as brothers and sisters in Christ. And if a choice must be made, we must always choose people over projects.

There is no perfect plan when it comes to the things of God.

Every Church is made up of unique people with unique gifts and abilities. Every congregation has a different location, building, and culture. The pastor, leadership team, and ministry leaders are distinctive in every setting. Therefore, ministry must fit that particular Church because there is no other church exactly like it.

Discipleship must also be tailored to each believer. Every person has a different past, present, and future. Personalities, learning styles, years of following Jesus, and biblical knowledge all influence spiritual growth. Therefore, people must be taught and encouraged in ways that fit their lives.

Raising godly children is just as unique. Some learn best in groups while others thrive with individual instruction. Countless factors shape a child’s heart and soul. Therefore, growth and development must be tailored to each young person’s needs and abilities.

There is no cookie-cutter approach to the things of God. We can certainly learn from what others have done, but copying them is rarely the best solution.

As individuals and as a community, we are one-of-a-kind followers of Jesus. Our approach to growth should reflect that reality. Just because something did not work for someone else does not mean it will not work for me. And just because it worked for another family does not guarantee it will work for mine.

Cookie cutters are great at Christmas, but they work poorly in the work of the Lord.

If you spend any time watching reels online, you have undoubtedly seen someone acting out a fake debate. They will place the camera to record them asking a question, then turn the camera, and the same person, often dressed differently, will respond to the question. It will go back and forth, as this person poses as someone very thoughtful who can easily destroy another person’s viewpoint.

The other day I was scrolling through Instagram, and one of these came up, and the viewpoint he caricatured was one I held. This thoughtful person would ask a question and then give his response, which was supposed to represent my view.

What bothered me to my core was that every answer he gave that I was supposed to agree with based on my theology was absolutely not a response I would give. He ignored scriptures, avoided hard questions about his view, and made my take look stupid. After watching for a couple of minutes, I was furious.

I started to write a scathing comment, and then I asked myself, “How many times have I done the same thing?” How often have I, in conversations, teaching, and even preaching, represented someone’s views as shallow and unbiblical?

Then this thought went through my head: “Why didn’t he just interview a real person who holds that belief?”

Real conversations are hard. We might hear something that challenges our thinking, makes our opponent appear smarter than we want to admit, and maybe prompts us to ask questions that go beyond surface-level faith. Often, real conversation will reveal that the people we caricature have deeply held beliefs and a genuine faith we don’t want to accept.

As a Christian, I am going to ask you to avoid videos like these and to engage in real conversations. Talk to people about what they truly believe while treating them with dignity and respect.

Jesus asked a lot of questions and gave people room to talk, and that should be a model for our faith, not our current culture of oversimplifying other people’s beliefs. We need more honest interaction and fewer videos with fake debates.

When you think of the Church, dozens of words come to mind. Some of mine are community, family, worship, discipleship, prayer, learning, and preaching.

Does the word grace come to mind for you?

We associate Jesus as the giver of grace, but what about the people who follow him?

I believe the Church community should be a place where grace overflows. We forgive one another, we offer second chances, and we are never quick to judge.

That is not to the exclusion of discipleship. We still expect people to grow, connect, and serve. We teach and expect people to learn about faith while applying it to their lives. We call people to live out their commitment to Jesus with seriousness and conviction.

But when they fail, misunderstand, or allow themselves to be deceived by evil, the primary reaction is to offer grace. A big part of being a follower of Jesus is not only our willingness to grow in faith but also in grace. Part of why we live in community is to hold each other accountable; the other part is to have support in our struggles. Both of those working together make the Church a unique group meant to help people on their journey of faith.

Some people spend their whole lives trying to be noticed. More followers. More attention. More approval. More recognition. We want to be seen, heard, and remembered.

But there is something quietly powerful about being elusive.

Jesus often stepped away from the crowds. After miracles, he would disappear into solitude. When people wanted to make him famous for the wrong reasons, he withdrew. He never chased attention, even though he deserved it more than anyone else.

Our culture teaches us to present ourselves constantly. Always posting and always reacting. Always available. But not every thought needs to be shared, and not every moment needs an audience.

There is wisdom in learning to live without needing constant validation. There is freedom in becoming harder for the world to define, because your identity is rooted in Christ rather than public opinion.

Elusive does not mean hiding from people. It means refusing to be controlled by the need to impress them.

Some of the deepest work God does in us happens away from the spotlight. In quiet obedience. In unseen faithfulness. In private prayer.

Not everything valuable has to be visible.

When you boil it all down, Church has two basic components, and everything else flows from them.

First, we are a group of people following the person and teaching of Jesus. A Christian Church is built on faith in Him. Not a set of rules, not a tradition, not a building, but a person. Jesus is the foundation, and we anchor our beliefs in what He said, how He lived, what He died for on the cross, and the resurrection that changed everything. Following His teaching means we love our enemies. We pursue humility, forgiveness, and justice. It’s simple to say, hard to live.

Second, we are following Jesus together. A Christian Church is a community of people. It isn’t a solo journey. The New Testament word for Church means “a gathered people.” We are called to carry each other’s burdens, to spur one another on, and to be the hands and feet of Christ in the world as a body, not just as individuals.

Church is about Jesus and people.

Those two things sound simple. But each one carries a lifetime of depth. There’s a whole Bible given to us to help us do them well. They’re simple concepts that are profoundly complex to execute. But no matter where you look in Scripture, no matter which doctrine or practice you examine, it all points back in one of those two directions: know Jesus and love people together.

That’s the Church. That’s always been the Church.

I once heard a man tell a group of graduating high school seniors that life has natural transition points. Graduation is one of them. Marriage, starting a career, having children, and retirement are other examples.

At those moments, we are forced to let go of the life we once knew and move in a different direction.

As we get older, though, transition points often come less naturally. We settle into routines, and life can become repetitive. We get stuck in ruts. Sometimes that is a good thing if the routine is healthy. Other times, it keeps us trapped in destructive patterns.

The good news of Jesus is deeply connected to the word “repent.” At its core, repentance means a change in direction. Through Jesus, we are not stuck. We can turn around at any moment. Your next transition point may only be one decision and one act of faith away.

We often think life only changes through major events and visible moments. But the truth is that a person can quietly decide to change at any time. No fanfare. No dramatic scene. Just faith in Jesus and a willingness to walk in a new direction.

Any day can become a transition point. Even today.

This might ruffle the feathers of some of the people in the Church I lead, but I need to say it.

“I don’t care what kind of worship music you prefer.”

Every time our Church uses a “hymn” during worship, someone has to run up to a member of the worship team to tell them how much they love the old music. It is exhausting. And let me tell you why.

First, I currently pick most of the worship music with my wife’s help. The first question I ask is, “Does this fit the overall theme of the day?” I select music that ties to the sermon for the day. The communion video is generally curated to serve as a bridge between worship and the sermon topic. Everything is built around a central thought. Sometimes the older songs fit the topic; other times the newer ones do. Whenever a person tells me the sermon inspired them, they rarely connect the music to the stage-setting for everything that was said, even though it all works together.

Second, I do not pick music to please any person. My second question is, “Will this glorify God?” As God listens to our worship of him, will he be pleased with what he hears? Occasionally, I have refused to sing certain songs because they give people bad theology or lead us into wrong thinking about God. Some songs also seem very “man-centered,” and while the theology is good, they do not fit for that day’s worship.

Finally, I have to consider who is playing for worship that week. I do not play music, and I deeply appreciate the people who do. My understanding is that some songs are difficult to play, especially for new members of the worship team. On other Sundays, we do not have someone to play the instrument that makes a song really work well. As a result, certain songs will not work. There is also a consideration of who is singing on the team that week and their vocal range. A group of wonderful volunteers leads us, and we are doing the best we can with what God has given us.

Every week, I am thankful for our volunteers who selflessly lead us in worship. Their willingness to stand up in front takes courage and the power of the Holy Spirit. Instead of telling us what kind of music you prefer, why don’t you express appreciation to the people who give of themselves for our congregation every week?

At the time I am writing this, I am having an ordinary day. I have no special meetings today. There are no appointments for anything. I have not received any emergency calls or texts. Nothing is going on in my life that is out of the ordinary.

Days like this are rare for me.

Perhaps they are for you, too. Maybe your schedule is overflowing, and every day holds a new challenge.

That is why we need to pause on the ordinary days and thank God for them. Sometimes the ordinary is a gift. Things could have been much worse and more hectic.

There are all kinds of reasons to be grateful. Today, I give thanks for nothing.

“Thanks, God, for a day to work quietly and think deeply because they are a rare gift in my world.”