Everyone needs a variety of people in their life.

You need people in your life to love and support you.

You need people in your life who will encourage you and stand beside you.

You need people in your life who will never leave you, no matter what you have done.

You need people to speak the truth to you about important matters.

You also need those who are willing to confront you.

If everyone in your life agrees with your views, thinking, and lifestyle choices, then you do not have a true friend.

I see people all the time who allow their lives to veer toward destruction because they have no one willing to confront them. When someone does finally address the issues, they run back to the people who will always agree with them. Eventually, the truthteller is treated like an enemy.

You may hate that one person in your life who speaks the harsh truth, but they might be the type of friend you genuinely need.  

When it comes to serving and participating in the body of Christ, I believe the bar needs to be set high. It is not something to be taken lightly. Following Jesus is not an easy venture; it never has been.

Consider these words from Jesus:

Luke 9:57-62 As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.”
(58) Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”
(59) He said to another man, “Follow me.” But he replied, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.”
(60) Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.”
(61) Still another said, “I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.”
(62) Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”

Matthew 10:37-39 “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. (38) Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. (39) Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”

Luke 14:25-27 Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: (26) “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple. (27) And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.”

Matthew 16:24-26 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. (25) For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. (26) What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?”

Jesus set the bar extremely high, and if I try to lower it to make people happy, then I am not representing his will for us. So, I continue to push people to make Jesus the center of their lives and nothing less.

The biggest question that has been guiding my ministry for the past 15 months is, “How does the Church develop spiritually mature believers?”

In Paul’s letter to the Christians in Ephesus, he proclaims that Christ gave specific leadership to the Church. He gave it apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, and teachers. All of them are to equip people for works of service so that the body of Christ may be built up “until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:11-13)

The goal of Church leadership is to develop people who are mature in their faith and look like Jesus.

How does that happen? What does it take for someone to want to serve other people? What does it take for people to desire to be in worship every week? What will convince someone to become a generous person with their time and resources? What are the steps necessary for someone to grow beyond infancy in their faith?

We can derive certain concepts from the Biblical stories that are helpful, but there are no set actions to follow step by step. Worship with Biblical teaching, a membership class, small groups, intentional discipleship, and Bible reading groups are part of what we are using. Still, we see only limited results.

The biggest hurdle to making mature believers is the desire of each follower of Jesus. Something must awaken inside of them to create a hunger for the things of God. The Church can’t force people into commitment; it can only create environments and actions for people to use when they are ready.

I desire to see people grow in their walk with the Lord. As a Church leader, I am doing everything to help, but I cannot lead people where they are not willing to go.

Many of the choices you make this week seem to have little impact on you: what you eat, the things that fill your schedule, the exercise you do or don’t do, the places you spend your money, and a hundred other things. You may see a small return on your choices, but not the complete picture. You will be fed, enjoy a game, and complete another week.

But there are also greater things happening. What you eat is impacting your body, along with your exercise plan. Your children are learning values from the events that fill your calendar. Your marriage relationship is growing closer or slowly moving further apart. Your financial decisions are a blessing or are starting to create insurmountable debt. Your spiritual life is growing, or you are remaining an infant in the faith.

Where you are today is often not the result of one big decision; rather, it is the result of hundreds of daily choices. Where you are in the future is the result of the hundreds of decisions you make this week.

Frequently, I talk to someone who has made a mess of their life, their children, or something significant to them. It is hard to explain to them that nothing they did today caused this; it has been building for years. And there is nothing they can do today that will fix it. It will take years of Godly decisions to turn things around.

Your life is the result of your choices, but most of the time, you will not understand it until somewhere down the road. There are few insignificant decisions in the long run.

One of my favorite images of the Church is the family of God. But you need to know that it is one of several metaphors used for the community of believers. It is a holy nation, a royal priesthood, and God’s special possession.

It is also like an army. Throughout the New Testament, the writers refer to people serving the Lord as soldiers. The Apostle Paul calls doing the work of ministry the good fight. Believers are to have on the full armor of God as they carry the Sword of the Spirit. We have an enemy, and we wage war against the forces of evil. Battle imagery is prevalent in most of the letters of the New Testament.

Each image has different connotations. There are lessons to be learned from a family and military personnel’s practices.

For me, family conjures up pictures of warm summer evenings, sitting around the fire, sharing a drink, a laugh, and the warmth of love. Being in the armed services paints a very different picture. There is basic training, facing dangerous situations, being on high alert, and depending on your fellow soldiers to protect you. It is not warm and friendly; it is challenging and demanding. 

I hope that when people connect to a Church, they become a part of a loving family. They also need to know that they are enlisting in the army and that their comrades depend on them to take their jobs seriously. At times, it will be demanding, but victory is assured.   

In children’s Church, we used to sing, “I may never march in the infantry, ride in the calvary, or shoot the artillery, but I am in the Lord’s Army.” My childish brain could not comprehend all that might mean, but as a mature believer, you need to understand that the song is still valid.

Whenever you say something like this, people will often quote Jesus’s words: “Don’t judge, lest you be judged.”

I understand this response. No one wants to be told they are behaving in an ungodly way. The defenses go up, and the claws come out.

Yet the verses that follow this statement in Matthew chapter seven state that we are to remove the log or plank from our own eye, and then we will be able to see clearly how to remove the speck from our brother’s eye. Two things are stated. First, we must take care of our own issues. Then, we are obligated to help our brother.

The problem people have when you say, “You have a problem,” is that you do not follow it up with the rest of the concept. For a follower of Jesus it is always, “You have a problem, just like I did, and I want to help you.” Let the other person know, “I want to show you the grace I received along with a way out. I sincerely want to be the support for you that I needed on my journey of faith.”

Everyone knows they have issues, and they are not looking for someone to point them out. What they need is someone to help them fix them in love.

Sometimes, the best thing to do is be direct and say exactly what you mean.

If you are a follower of Jesus:

-Attend Church every week and stop making excuses.

-Park far away and leave the close spots for guests.

-Sit near the front of the auditorium in the middle.

-Sit close to the people around you.

-Shake hands with guests and ask about their lives.

-Smile and be friendly.

-Sing loud; even if you are off-key, the Lord is listening.

-Learn to sit for one hour without leaving the auditorium. No matter how it looks, it is distracting to the speaker.

-Engage the sermon in any way possible. Do things like bringing a Bible, taking notes, and looking at the speaker.

-Plan to hang around and visit with people. Don’t be in a hurry to leave.

-Don’t be selfish when leaving the parking lot.

-Contact someone in the afternoon and tell them how much you appreciated seeing them.

Being a part of a Church is more than what happens on Sunday morning. But I am also entirely convinced that if Christian people did the things listed above every single Sunday morning, then we would reach hundreds more people with the message of the Gospel.

I am going through the “Rooted” discipleship book with a member of our congregation. It is my first time reading the book, and it has been an enlightening journey together. There are ten weeks of readings, and each week is broken down into five days of reading, questions, and reflection space.

This is the beginning of week 10, day 1 –

“I’m assuming that we are all committed to the Church. We are not only Christian people; we are also Church people. We are not only committed to Christ, we are also committed to the body of Christ. At least I hope so … For the Church lies at the very center of the eternal purpose of God. It is not a divine afterthought. It is not an accident of history. On the contrary, the Church is God’s new community.”                    — John Stott

Then, they add this as their first paragraph following the quote.

“The Bible is very clear: Christians are to belong to a Church – to belong to the body of Christ. That word, ‘belong,’ is kind of a tricky word, because it means more than ‘just show up as often as you can on Sundays.’ We use the word ‘belong’ the same way you would if you were saying you belong to your family. When you belong to your family, it doesn’t mean you just show up to be fed when you are hungry, rest when you’re tired, and use the family name for application when needed.”                                –Rooted page 208

I am now 52 years old, and it has taken all those years to become aware of how God created me.

At an early age, I noticed that I was different from other kids. I could remember things easily. That meant I didn’t spend long hours studying like the other students did. I would listen in class or read the textbook, and I could recall most of it without effort.

In college, I maintained an average GPA with little work. I had learned to absorb enough information to pass tests and do my assignments while having a very active social life. This was the first place I started to see differences in my brain. I read books very slowly compared to most people, but I never forget big-picture ideas and significant insights.

Finally, I entered the ministry and began to feel a vast separation when talking to other pastors. My experiences, sermons I had heard, lessons I was taught, and information I received were indelibly etched in my brain. Before our phones carried all this information, I used to walk around repeating other people’s sermons I had recently heard. Through the years, I was able to build a warehouse of stuff in my brain that I now use every week to write sermons and preach from memory.

I hesitate to talk about this much because, as you may be thinking to yourself, people can hear this as me having a huge ego. What I want people to know, this is not about me. God gave me a gift. I do not recall everything I have experienced. Still, significant lessons and experiences are burned into my brain, and I can remember them with nearly perfect accuracy as far back as when I was two years old. I did not have to work to become like this, although I do work at keeping lists to ease my anxiety.

Almost daily, someone will comment to me about my memory; while it can be flattering, I want people to know it is all about God. He created me with a unique attribute, and I am trying to use it for his glory. I could spend hours telling you about the downside to this gift, but I try to emphasize that I believe God made me this way so that I could serve him as a pastor.

Here is the thing: I believe this is true for everyone. Each one of us has some gift that separates us from others. It could be a strong work ethic, empathy, a particular skill or ability, personality, or a thousand other things. We are all God’s unique creation and have something to offer the world that will bring him glory.

I spent 51 years downplaying how God made me, and lately, I am starting to embrace it. Not to bring myself glory but to underline that we can use our uniqueness for God’s glory. I hope you will use your special gifts alongside me to make more and better disciples. In the end, it’s all about God.     

Whatever gift, skill, talent, or ability you possess can be used for the Lord.

As a Church leader, I dream of new, different, and better ways to do ministry. I am here to help equip Christians and guide them into a life of service for their faith. Over the years, I have been amazed at all the ways God has used people for his glory.

Wherever you feel God is leading you to minister in his name, I believe you can do it.

It may take imagination, sweat, creativity, labor, networking, communication, and lots of prayer, but there is something that you can do for the Lord.

Talent plus passion plus God equals an impact for his kingdom.

If you can dream it, I know God can use it. The only thing that limits ministry is the person doing the dreaming.