Make them hate to see you leave in the morning.

Make them excited to see you come home in the evening.

Make every weekend or day off a joy for the person you married.

One of the most significant indicators of a person living for Jesus is the way their spouse views them.

My current sermon series is stretching my understanding of the Bible and how to summarize it for others. I have read hundreds of pages for each sermon and have spent numerous hours writing and rewriting. It is challenging to cover the entire story of the Bible in nine parts, and I feel like I am doing an adequate job.

While I was sitting in my office working on one of the latest sermons, my internal voice said quietly, “Why do you do this to yourself?” Why do I preach complex sermon series, thought-provoking topics, and perplexing passages?

No one is telling me I need to preach these sermons. I have no leader or group of leaders telling me what to preach. So why do I do this to myself?

I do it because I am convinced it is easy to become complacent. This is especially true in our walk of faith. The tendency is to walk the path of least resistance and not push ourselves in any way.

I genuinely want to know the Bible better, communicate more effectively, and grow in my faith. This means I must push myself. No one else will ask me to stretch and improve – only me.

If you have been a Christian for years, let me ask you: What are you doing to stretch yourself and your faith in Jesus? What are you doing that makes you uncomfortable and uneasy? What are you doing that will cause you to pray more and think more deeply?

More Christians drift into apathy than move to agnosticism. If you are not rowing strenuously against the tide of complacency by your own choice, no one else is going to push you. One way to keep a healthy faith is to continually put yourself in situations that will stretch you.

My wife was wrong. Clearly wrong. So I did what any red-blooded American male would do: I put together a list of reasons that she was incorrect. I used logic, illustrations, referred to historical precedent, and put together an airtight case. I knew that after I had hit her with all my responses, she would be blown away by my wisdom and change her viewpoint to align with mine.

The paragraph above is entirely made up, but it comes from years of marital counseling. One person would have this completely developed argument and not understand why their spouse could not reach an agreement with their stance.

Relationships do not work that way. People are rarely convinced to change their opinions based on logical arguments. Other factors at play make that conversion complex, including personal experience, the teaching of others, and long-held beliefs.

While this is undoubtedly true in marital relationships, it is also true in our spiritual conversations. The internet is flooded with videos, podcasts, and articles that have well-reasoned, logical arguments for faith. And yet, the world is still largely unconverted. Why?

This is because the transformation of thinking is also an emotional experience. Just like an argument in my marriage must come from a place of love and concern, so does the sharing of our faith. Therefore, if we want the people in our lives to know Jesus, we must have an authentic relationship of love and concern before they will listen to our viewpoint on faith.

Defense of the faith arguments are fantastic for strengthening the faith of believers, but if Christians genuinely want to make people disciples of Jesus, then we must draw close to them. Treating people as future friends will often do more good than developing airtight arguments about why we believe.

This week, if you want to make a difference for Jesus, set the material you are studying aside and invite your unbelieving neighbor over for dinner. Transformation happens best in relationships.

What does this Pastor really feel about his time with his Church community on Sunday?

To be honest, there are things I hate about it. I hate it when people are selfish in their parking and seating and generally treat others poorly. I hate when people ignore guests and display a lousy mood. I hate it when people talk about themselves with no concern for others. I hate it when people don’t sing, or they talk during the sermon and act like they do not care about worship. I hate it when people run out after our time together and do not connect with anyone. I hate when the people of God do not act like Jesus.

To be fair, there are things I love about it. I love seeing people being kind, loving, and compassionate to one another. I love watching people sit at the front, welcome guests, and show kindness toward everyone. I love seeing people encourage, pray, and meet the needs of one another. I love hearing people sing the songs of faith, take notes during the message, and throw themselves into worship in every way. I love listening to people visit with each other before and after our time together. I love the people who hang around and talk to me about what they are learning and how they are growing. I love seeing people’s lives transformed by the power of Jesus. I love the people who message me with kind words, prayer requests, and questions to help their faith. I love those two or three people that I know genuinely care about my wife and me beyond our leadership in the Church.

Honestly, the list of positive things about the Church is far longer than any negative one that I could write. There are far more things to love than hate.

Do I wish the Church were perfect? Yes!

Do I love this faith community? Also YES!

Even the words we only say to ourselves. 

Especially the words we only say to ourselves.

Before God’s word tells us about sin entering the world, the curse as a result, or the general mess we see all around us. It starts with over two chapters of beauty and wonder.

We have a mighty Creator. The world is a good place. God has a plan. You and I are created in the very image of God. We need relationships with other people, and our ultimate relationship is with our Maker.

Most of us start our days with a Genesis 3 mindset where we feel our world is cursed and we are a failure, instead of a Genesis 1-2 mindset.

Perhaps today, you need to say to yourself that you are more than the sum of your mistakes. Your world is not cursed; God has a plan for you, and you are his child. Then allow that to influence your heart and mind today.

I was scrolling through social media, and I saw the possibility to “add friend” of someone I knew well years ago. After a couple of quick clicks, I was on their page, scrolling through posts and pictures. Immediately, my heart was broken.

This person who used to love the Lord and serve the Church beside me was clearly very far from God at this point. The content of their life online was the exact opposite of what they used to be like.

The single most challenging part of my life as a pastor is watching people walk away from faith. Seeing people who once loved Jesus and me, and now they live far from both of us.

Faith is a lifelong journey, and every time someone gives up, it breaks my heart. Every time.

Reading the pages of scripture, I find comfort in knowing I’m not alone in my stupidity. The Bible’s characters, human and flawed, stumble at every turn. From Abraham’s half-truths about Sarah and his missteps with Hagar to Peter denying Christ three times, these stories remind me that I’m far from the most flawed soul to walk this earth.

Yet, more profoundly comforting is God’s unwavering presence amidst my shortcomings. He doesn’t abandon me in my folly but meets me in the midst of my mess, offering hope. The concepts of grace, forgiveness, and mercy are not mere words but indelible impressions on my soul, a testament to God’s enduring presence. His word extends an invitation to cast our burdens upon Him, for He cares deeply for us.

Reflecting on my life, I recognize that most of my headaches and heartaches have stemmed from my own actions. It’s reassuring to know this experience is universal. Even in my darkest moments, I’m surrounded by reminders that I’m never truly alone. This shared human experience of imperfection and divine grace offers a profound comfort, connecting us all in our struggles and redemption.

Read your Bible

Set aside time and pray.

Attending a religious small group and participating.

Listen to a sermon, lecture, or informative podcast about some aspect of faith.

Take one day and fast so that you have more time for God.

Read a book that stretches your faith.

Invite a mature Christian to coffee or lunch and pick their brain.

Volunteer to teach, lead, or serve in some new capacity.

Go on a mission trip.

Find someone and intentionally share Jesus with them.

(Repeat)

It is highly unlikely that you did not know the tools mentioned above. There are no new tricks or techniques to grow spiritually. You need to keep doing the same things over and over, and eventually, you will become more like Jesus. Growth comes from not only knowing what to do but by doing it.

It sent a shockwave through my body. I was listening to a sermon from another pastor not too far away from me, and he was talking about growing in our commitment to Jesus. Then, he launched into a rant that I am not sure if he had planned or not. He stated that, in his view, the problem with Vacation Bible Schools was that they are shallow and don’t give people a real depth of faith. He went on to say that was also his issue with most Church youth groups. The teens get together and play games and don’t learn much about Jesus.

In part, I think it was a direct statement against our Church, as we have a huge VBS and a thriving youth group. One problem was that he had no idea what happens at either of those programs at our Church. His words were based on a faulty assumption that says, “If a Church is growing and reaching people for Jesus, then it must be producing only shallow Christians.” The premise is that only by “watering down the gospel” or “sugar-coating Jesus” will numerical growth happen.

I am here to say that is simply not true. I know it is not valid for my community of believers. But it is also not something that the Bible teaches. Throughout the book of Acts, the Church grows and thrives. First, there are 3,000 believers, then 5,000, and then myriads, or literally tens of thousands. Jesus said if he were lifted up, he would draw all men to himself. He told his followers the fields were white for harvest, and they were to go into all the world, presumably to reap the harvest of people for the kingdom of God.

My conviction is that the gospel message is attractive. I don’t have to add anything to it or remove anything from it to draw a crowd. We only need to keep teaching about grace, forgiveness, love, transformation, meaning, and purpose, and the people will come.

This weekend, I will stand up and share the story of the Bible to the best of my ability. I live with the expectation that God will use it to transform lives through the power of the gospel. Whether you are a child, have a child, are a teenager, or are an adult, we have an age-appropriate program for you that I know you will love and can be the key to the change that you have been looking for.

The 21^st century has brought us a new brand of fighter. There is a group of people who enjoy fighting with others in the comment section of posts. The form of social media does not seem to matter, as they are equipped to share their opinions and ideas in every format. There is no safe place to hide from their cutting comments, sharp wit, and deadly arguments.

I admit, sometimes, when I see a post, I quickly click on the comments simply to see how long it took for someone to start spewing hostility. I also want to see if their criticisms are precisely what I thought they would be. Almost always, I am not disappointed or surprised at how rapidly a seemingly harmless post can derail into an argument, especially when the Bible, faith, or Jesus are mentioned. 

The problem with these battles is that no one ever wins. Let me ask you honestly: have you ever changed your mind because someone confronted you in the comment section of a social media post?

While I do believe legitimate questions need to be addressed, they are always best handled in person by a trusted Christian leader with a thorough knowledge of the Bible. Arguing with random people online is a fruitless venture.

If you are a Christian and you want to make a difference in this world, it will rarely happen behind a keyboard. The call is for us to go into all the world and personally interact in the name of Jesus. The mission field is waiting outside your doors, where people long for human interaction. The more the world moves online, the greater the impact a few people will have who are willing to be the hands and feet of Jesus rather than fingers on a keyboard.