The longer I live as a Christian, the more open and honest I am becoming. The more willing I am to share my struggles as a believer and a pastor.

Whenever I share my thoughts and feelings of worthlessness, shame, and the issues I face in following Jesus, there is a group of Christians ready to chastise me. “You’re a pastor,” they say, “You should have your life more together than that.” These people want me to speak with the confidence and self-assurance of a person who has faith all figured out.

There is also another group of people. They will read a post I wrote or listen to a sermon I have preached, and they will message me privately or whisper to me in the back corridors of the Church, “I thought I was the only one who struggled with this,” or “I believed I was the only person who thought like that.”

What I have found is that in sharing the truth of the difficulties in my journey of faith, I am better equipped to set people free through the word and work of Jesus. Not only does dragging my own darkness into the light help me, but it also encourages others to face their issues. 

For those people who want a perfect pastor, I am not your guy. I encourage you to find a Church with a leader you can admire. But if you are broken and fighting hard to grow in your faith, then you have found your people and a leader who knows what you are struggling with and is not afraid to admit it.