We all love the idea of being the hero. We want to be the one who swoops in with a kind word, a helping hand, or a shoulder to cry on. As followers of Jesus, our hearts are drawn toward compassion. Scripture calls us to “bear one another’s burdens,” and so we often step into the lives of people who seem to be hurting or struggling.

That is good and right. But here’s something we often overlook: when you step in to “stand with” someone, you may, without realizing it, be “standing against” someone else. Your support can unintentionally cast another person as the villain in the story.

It happens in marriages when a friend takes sides. It often occurs in church conflicts when one person’s pain is attributed to the fault of another person. It happens in families when comfort for one child feels like criticism of the other.

Jesus calls us to be peacemakers, not just rescuers. Sometimes being a true friend means listening to the whole story before taking a side. It means offering comfort without feeding resentment. It means encouraging reconciliation rather than deepening the divide.

The hero of the Christian life is never us—it’s Jesus. Our role is not to be the savior, but to point people to the Savior. And when we do that, we avoid turning our compassion into an unintended weapon.