I recently watched a short online video about Christianity and noticed it had an unusually high number of comments. Many of them repeated the same phrase: “Christianity isn’t a religion, it’s a relationship with Jesus.”

Over time, this phrase has been repeated so often that it’s become a cliché. People echo it as though it clarifies what we believe about Jesus. Personally, I don’t think it adequately captures the Christian faith.

Let me ask you directly: “Do you find relationships easy?”

If you’re like most people, your greatest stress in life comes from the people you deeply love. Relationships bring joy, but also tension, misunderstanding, and heartbreak. I deeply love my wife, but being in a relationship with her takes effort, and I know she’d say the same about me.

Relationships demand hard work, time, and attention. We frequently misread the other person’s motives, misconstrue their behavior, find it difficult to connect in the way they need, and sometimes drift apart.

I do believe Christianity involves a relationship with Jesus, but I don’t consider that a compelling angle that simplifies faith in him. Honestly, I’d prefer a religion that offered a straightforward list of rules. Then I could always gauge my standing and know precisely what comes next. A relationship, however, constantly requires my complete focus and leaves little room for doing whatever I want.

Christians are in a relationship with Jesus, but that elevates the expectations of our faith rather than diminishing them, contrary to how most people frame it.