It is quite possible you are filled with stress and anxiety, not because you are trying to please God or even other people. Instead, you are trying to quiet the voice in your head.

Deep down, you want a spectacular body, to be a terrific spouse and amazing parent while having a well-informed, Spirit-guided, servants’ heart as a believer. You want a perfect house, a nice ride, a well-manicured lawn with a rose garden to match. You want to live farm to table with homegrown vegetables, chickens, cows, and two well-trained dogs. You want to be involved in your school, your Church, and the local civic group. You want your life to look good to the Jones across the street and on social media.

No one told you your life should be this way, but you have seen enough TV shows, magazine articles, and Pinterest posts to know how things should look. You have heard enough sermons and lessons at Church to know everything you should be doing. If you stop to ask your friends, they will tell you all the ways they are improving their life, and you will be left feeling like you are falling behind.

Self-applied pressure is good if it motivates you to be a better person. All of us need the occasional kick in the pants to keep us from getting lazy. A regular dose of inspiration is required to keep us moving forward in our faith, family, and toward the desired future.

On the other hand, self-applied pressure is terrible when it leads to guilt, a lack of self-worth, and depression. There should be times when you should be resting and enjoying the moment, but you cannot because that inner voice drives you to get busy. When you end each day feeling defeated, then you are not walking the right path.

One key to having a joy-filled life is learning to apply the right amount of pressure to produce positive results. Everyone wants to see you growing, but usually, no one wants it more than you. It would be best if you leaned into the motivation that keeps you improving while avoiding the emotions of self-defeat. It is a delicate balance that takes a lifetime to learn, and many never find it.

Occasionally we need to be reminded that we are enough. We love, and we are loved. When a day is not spectacular, and we let ourselves down again, maybe we need to change our expectations to quiet that voice inside. If you don’t, you will never have the joy God intended.

 “No” is such a hard word to say.  I suppose this is because we have no idea the type of emotions it will meet in response.  A negative statement often attracts a negative reaction.  Saying no will often make other people angry, create feelings of disappointment and fertilize bitterness. 

The result is that use more hopeful-sounding words and phrases like maybe, might, possibly, could be, and we will see.  Those are all just nice ways of saying no to someone. 

Unfortunately, No is a word that we need to hear and say sometimes.  It speaks the truth and closes the doors of unachievable dreams.  It helps us to see where we stand in a situation.  It moves us to start walking in a new direction.  No does not need to be said with a vengeance, but sometimes it must be said. 

The challenge is that the next time someone tells you no, do not take it personally.  If you do, the chances of you hearing the truth again are significantly reduced.  Then you will spend the rest of your life having people trying to find a nice way to tell you no.

In the end, they will feel bad for giving you a glimmer of hope that never existed.  You will also feel bad because you were disappointed once again.  One mark of a follower of Jesus is that our identity is wrapped up in him and not others’ disapproval.  Being able to handle a no response is a sign of spiritual maturity that most people overlook.     

Abraham waited 25 years from the time God promised to bless him with a child until it happened.  Joseph had to wait 13 years between a vision of his future until his brothers bowed down before him.  David was anointed as the next king of Israel to replace Saul.  It took him 10 more years before he would sit on the throne. 

There is often a gap between knowing that God is working until his job is finished.  This is true of the heroes of the Bible and in your life.  If life seems to be unfulfilled, and you are struggling to see the goodness of God, then your story is probably not over yet. 

Often, we spend large sections of our lives in the middle.  We are in the middle of what is God is doing IN us.  We are in the middle of what God is doing TO us.  We are in the middle of what God is doing THROUGH us.  We are not at the beginning, and we are still a long way to the end.

One challenge to having faith is waiting on God.  His timeline is not like ours. We pace back and forth in front of the microwave as if seconds were an hour.  God is never late, but he is also never early.  He works at just the right time in the world and in our lives. 

Patience is a virtue.  Your life may be a mess, and that simply means that God is not finished writing his story.  Tie and knot and hold on tight.  God’s work may only take another 10, 15, or 25 years.  Just ask David, Joseph, and Abraham.