I was watching an episode of my favorite TV show American Pickers and I saw an exchange that got me thinking. A lady opened a storage area that she had not been in for years. Her, Mike and Frank were looking through all the piles of stuff inside and they found a picture of her great-grandfather. She said she had never seen a picture of him before and was greatly pleased at the finding. They held the picture up for the camera and it was a picture of him sitting at the head of the table in a board room of his business. She made a comment about it being the only picture she knew existed of her great-grandfather.

I couple this experience with a comment my wife made last night. We were lying together in our living room and she asked the boys to take a picture of us since so few pictures of us together exist. She was right, if you flip through our photo album there are very few pictures of either of us and especially together. The pictures of me usually include a large fish or one of the animals I have hunted down and shot through the years.

These two experiences have me thinking about a single question, “What pictures would I want my great-grandchildren to find of me in the future?” If only a couple of pictures of me are in existence, what would I want future generations to learn about me through those pictures. I have come up with a short list of pictures I want to be found in:

1. A picture of me serving the Lord. I would like my great-grandchildren to see that I was a preacher. I would especially like them to see me serving outside of the pulpit. Maybe that is leading a small group, visiting a member, or just helping clean up. I want future generations to know that I served the Lord to the best of my ability. This was the biggest defining characteristic in my life.

2. A picture of me with my wife. I want future generations to know that I was married and I loved the woman I married. They need to know that it was not easy for either of us to stay together but we stuck it out and fell more in love through the years.

3. A picture of me with my children. I hope my relatives know that I loved my family. While I was a preacher I did not neglect my family but loved them the best I could love them. Maybe this would be a picture of me playing with them or standing with them after a game or just sitting on the couch together.

4. A picture of me with my parents. My parents have been the single biggest influence in my life and I want other people to know that they were the ones who molded and shaped me. I love them and hope their quiet influence is not lost with the years.

5. A picture of me genuinely smiling. My life has been greatly blessed in every way. I have a great Church, incredible parents, a beautiful wife and wonderful children. I have activities I enjoy and have no real reason to complain. I want others to know that I have had a great life and God was the source of all that I have been given.

This is a short list but I am happy with it. If I die and only these 5 pictures of my life existed, that would be enough. It would communicate who I am and what my life is all about.

What pictures do you have of yourself? What pictures do you want of yourself?

Maybe today could be the day to take a new picture of what really matters to you.

I was sitting here thinking about what to write. My kids are home because of the snow day and I am working at my house. The power of the internet makes it possible for me to work almost anywhere. With the snow outside here in Adrian travel has been limited four times in the last two weeks and my family is getting a little cabin fever. So I thought for today I would share a few little ways me (and my family) use a snow day.

1. Internet, internet, internet. I have been reading blogs, writing blogs, catching up on all my emails and doing research on future Church stuff. I enjoy taking the time to research every idea about every possible thing.

2. Read. I have a pile of magazines that I am slowly working through. I have everything from Christian leadership magazines to hunting and fishing to the Christian Standard. I also have several books that I need to catch up on. I started one on manhood that looks to be enlightening.

3. Family Time. I really enjoy spending time with my wife and my boys. I have had the opportunity to eat with them, talk with them, and watch movies with them.

4. Paperwork. It’s tax season. I am buying a house. I have dozens of other pieces of paperwork that have been piling up. I hate it, I hate it – but it has to get done.

5. Relax. I think sometimes God allows snow days to remind us to slow down. Taking a day off every now and then is important for both your physical and spiritual health. I am thankful for everyday, especially snow days.

I am sure none of this is news to you. This is just how I am spending my snow days. Hopefully this will be the last for a while as I am ready to get back into my routine. I am sure you are too.

I have read several more good blogs lately. I want to share them with you and I hope you enjoy reading

1. Here is the original blog post about “Aging with Zeal.” This is about J.I. Packer’s latest book that I used this as an illustration for my “Up” sermon.

2. Here is a great post about Fallen Pastors and the lessons they teach all of us.

3. If you don’t read Mark Merrill’s blog you are missing out on some great family material. Here are two examples:
– 10 Ways to Push Your Spouse Away
– How to Respond to Hurtful Words in Front of your Kids

4. This is a long story but you have to read about David Murray’s Worst Honeymoon Ever.

5. Here is a great little reminder that God Doesn’t Do Hollywood Endings

6. Chris Elrod is a pastor at an inner city Church in Florida. This story entitled “Then I Noticed Her Shoes” is about some girls and is touching but also an important reminder of the needs of others.

This is my final week as a youth basketball coach. I coached a 7th grade “B” team in Alaska for 3 years and now I have coached a 6th grade “B” team for 1 year in Missouri. With this year, my youngest son will move into Jr. High and then High School and I see no need for coaches in these areas in our school. So most likely this is my final week of coaching ever. I can honestly say that I am not overly sad about the prospect of becoming a parent who only watches without coaching, but it has me reflecting on the experience. Through the years the kids have taught me about life, made me smile, made me angry, made me laugh and overall it has been a good experience.

Here are just a couple of simple lessons the kids have taught me through the years.

1. Sports are fun. I am not sure when sports became about wins and losses, about scholarships and trophies, but I wish it hadn’t happened. When you coach a “B” team most of the kids are just happy to be on a team. Man invented sports to do something enjoyable in their spare time. Dads – loosen up and enjoy yourself and let your kids enjoy it. (I am preaching to myself too.) Sports should be a fun experience for everyone.

2. Celebrate the small things. This year we lost a game 52-6. I was angry at the decisions of the other coach who I think has some issues, but that is his problem. Anyway, when my boys scored each basket they celebrated like they had just won the game. I find myself so happy just to see a good pass or a nice rebound or even a simple act of sportsmanship. I think this should be true in every arena of life.

3. Kids are sponges. Young people learn from how we coach, how we talk, what makes us angry, and how we do everything. I notice teams take on the personality of their coaches. It is scary … at least to me. I would say that young boys are especially impressionable. Many of the boys I coach have no father figure and a coach is an important part of their life. Honestly, all men in their life have influence. We should never take this lightly.

4. Remember the good, forget the bad. After each game the boys come up and talk to me about that one play or that one shot they made. They forget the turnovers, mistakes and misses. They remember the good and easily forget the bad. I wish several adults could learn that lesson.

5. You can learn anything, if you want to. Many of the boys I have coached through the years have never played basketball before that year. If they listen and try they will get better. I am amazed at how much some of the boys pick up throughout the course of a season. The improvement can be dramatic. I think this applies to any of us, even in our faith, that if we make a regular effort to learn we can grow in any area.

Those are just a few life lessons my teams have taught me. If you have ever worked with kids I am sure you have your list. This is mine and this week as I close the book on my coaching I thank God for all the kids have taught me.

I sit here looking out my office window at the 5 or 6 inches of snow we received in Adrian Missouri over the weekend. It stopped us from having our regular Church meeting yesterday and caused the cancellation of almost every event my family had planned for the weekend. It reminded me of the story about the snow flake that said, “Alone I can do nothing, but if we all stick together we can accomplish anything.” Well, these little flakes stuck together and stopped our town cold.

But as I look out my window at a sea of white I am reminded of something else. While living in Alaska my primary source of heat was wood. I had to cut, split and stack piles and piles of wood. The side yard at my house was an ugly pile of wood to be cut, bark and sticks where it had been split and a pile of wood ready to burn. It was always a mess to look at from the big picture windows of my home. Then it would snow. It would immediately be transformed into this beautiful pile of white and brown that made a tapestry of winter landscape. I tried to take pictures to capture it (like above) but I am not a very good photographer. I can tell you that I loved how my ugly side yard would instantly become beautiful when the white of snow was added.

That reminds me of a line in Isaiah chapter 1. There is a prediction that the people of God are going to turn away from Him, but if they turn back, something beautiful will happen.

“Come now, let us reason together,” says the Lord. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.”
Isaiah 1:18 (NIV)

When people turn to God and accept forgiveness through Jesus, the ugly mess of their lives will become as white as snow. I love that image … even though I hate this snow.

If you live near Adrian Missouri – this applies to you on Feb 28th going into March 1

Jim Smith went to church one Sunday morning. He heard the musicians miss a note during the worship and winced. He saw a teenager talking when everybody was supposed to be bowed in silent prayer. He felt the usher was watching to see what he put in the offering plate, and it made his blood boil. He caught five grammatical errors in the sermon by actual count. As he slipped out through the side door immediately after the closing song, he muttered to himself, “this Church is just not for me.”

Ron Jones went to church one Sunday morning. He heard the musicians play a beautiful arrangement of “It is Well With My Soul” and thrilled to God’s majesty. He overheard a young girl speak of the difference faith makes in her life. He was glad to see his church was sharing in a special offering for the hungry children of Africa. He especially appreciated the sermon that Sunday – it answered a question that had bothered him for a long time. He thought, “How can anyone enter this place and not feel the presence of God?”

Both went to the same church on the same Sunday morning. Each found what he was looking for. What will you find this Sunday?

Jesus will often say a line after telling a parable that I didn’t understand for a long time. He will frequently say “He who has ears, let him hear.” All of us have ears, so what kind of statement is that?

Throughout my life those words of Jesus become clearer and clearer in my understanding. One of the things that has helped my understanding is coaching youth basketball. Twice a week I have practice for an hour and half with a sixth grade “B” team. I have 9 boys who come to practice and all of them have limited skills. Some of the issue is simply body development such as boys who haven’t grown yet along boys who have grown but are not used to their adult bodies. As a result, we spend a lot of time just trying to develop basic skills for basketball. I quickly noticed the boys fall into two very distinct groups. One group is the boys who really want to learn. They have a strong desire to learn the game and improve their skills. They listen closely and work hard at every drill we do. The second group of boys are the opposite. They usually come to practice late and give a half effort most of the time. The are always talking and never listen close. They have no desire to improve they just want to have fun in the moment.

Watching these boys reminds me of many of the people who attend Church or call themselves a Christian. There are two distinct groups of people who I encounter. One group wants to learn and grow and the other group are living in the moment and don’t really think about growth. Jesus describes the two groups as those who listen and grow and those who really are not listening. Some people have the desire to grow and some people simply do not.

So which group are you in?

If you are the group that really has a desire to grow and change then I have good news for you. Today there are a thousand things to help you out. You can do Google search or look up a podcast or attend a conference or find a group or get the help you need. A little searching and hard work and you can find the help you want to get you growing.

If you are in the second group I really have no idea what to do with you. I am not sure how to get you motivated any more than I can get those boys motivated. This season I have been calm and friendly to encourage them. I have threatened them with no play and extra running. I have shouted and yelled. I have drown outlines on a white board while explaining every possible step. And yet I still have boys who don’t care about getting better as a player.

Let me make this real simple. We need to honestly evaluate who we are as followers of Jesus. But as people of faith we need to honestly evaluate the people around us. What type of people are you investing your time in? What type of people are you surrounding yourself with? Are they pushing you to grow as a believer? Are you pushing them to grow in their faith?

You will only become what you desire to become. So what do you desire?

If I sat down with you and began to grill you with questions I bet you can tell me at least one major flaw in your life. You can tell me about a sin you have struggled with for years. You can tell me situations that bring out the very worst in you.

I know it is true for me. I have a sin that I have fought for years and know I will fight into the future, probably to the grave. I have situations that make me act like someone I am not proud of. (No, I am not going to tell you any of these!) I know they exist and I carry this baggage with me everyday. I often think of the words of the Apostle Paul in his letter to the Church at Rome. Romans 7:15-17 “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. (16) And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. (17) As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.”

I know I have this sin living in me. It is like an evil seed in my soul that can sprout and bring the weeds of sin and guilt at any time. My question is what can I do about it?

Here is my short list of dealing with sin I know about in my life.

1. Avoid Bad Situations – All of us have “triggers” that set us off. These need to be avoided at all costs. Don’t go to a place that serves alcohol. Don’t be alone with a member of the opposite sex. Don’t be at home alone with the internet. Don’t attend functions that make you angry. Don’t watch movies with scenes that affect your soul negatively. Don’t put yourself in situations that will make you compromise your integrity.

2. Avoid Negative Influences – All of us have people who are the “triggers” in our life. These often need to be avoided. This is tough but a vital part of protecting our soul. Recently a woman described to me how her husband acts around his friends. He claims to be a Christian but when he is around his non-Christian friends he degrades women and they will look at a pornographic material. I simply told her, “He needs new friends.” Don’t visit with the lady that gossips. Don’t spend your free time with people who tear you down.

3. Find Someone to Support You – I have rarely seen someone beat sin alone. Usually we need someone to encourage us on this journey. Someone to hold us accountable. Someone to pray for us. Someone to challenge us and cheer us on. Each one of us needs a “sponsor” to help us with the struggles of sin.

4. Pray for Help – I take a few minutes everyday to ask God to help me with my struggles. I ask Him to forgive me, but I also ask Him to give me strength to make the right decisions or to walk the right path. The Lord’s prayer says “Lead us not into temptation.” A better translation is to “lead us away from temptation.” I need the Lord’s help through His presence in the Holy Spirit and strength in my soul to make the right decisions.

This is my short list of things I am trying to do to overcome in my struggle with sin. I am sure none of this is new information to you if you have been a believer for very long. In fact, I bet you have heard something similar dozens of times. Here is the hard reality many of us find ourselves wrapped up in – we know the problems in our lives and we know what to do to avoid them. We know both sides of the equation. The problem is that we don’t do the right thing we know to do. So my prayer for your today, and for me, is that you would have the courage and strength to do the one thing that helps us overcome our struggles. I know you can do it!

An executive friend of mine once told me that their company did what they called a “360 degree evaluation” on an annual basis. The concept was a simple three-step process. First, you fill out a self-evaluation of your work, work environment and productivity. Then the company would take a similar evaluation form to your supervisor. They would have your boss evaluate your work, work environment and productivity. Finally, the company would take an evaluation form to someone that you supervise and ask them the same questions.

He went on to explain to me that there was usually a big difference between our self-evaluation and the evaluation of others. This difference often ran in one of two directions. First, several workers were extremely critical of themselves. They wrote of their lack of knowledge, their strained environment and low productivity compared to what they could (or should) be doing. This thinking often did not line up with what those around them vocalized. There was a huge gap between how they saw themselves and how those around them viewed their work.

The other direction this could go is obvious. Numerous workers evaluated themselves very well. They were working hard, a joy to be around and productivity could not be better. Then when the supervisor and the supervised were asked the same questions they had a totally opposite description. There was this huge gap between how they saw themselves and how those around them viewed their work.

What brought this conversation up with this executive was the simple question of, “How is your week going?” He then launched into a 20 minute breakdown of all that was happening and how stressful it was to everyone. He told me that it was a difficult to find out the real truth about anyone. It was a process that he would rather avoid no matter how helpful.

I have never forgotten that conversation. In fact, I am reminded of it every time I do any counseling. A couple comes in and sits down to talk. She thinks their marriage is a train wreck and he can’t see anything wrong. The other thing that happens is that both people see their marriage as a train wreck but they completely disagree on why it is that way. She says its his fault and he says it is her fault. It can be really difficult to find out the truth about anyone. Within just the last week I have had a couple of people describe desperate situations in which the other person saw no problems.

All of this leads me to the conclusion that self evaluations can be very flawed and yet most of us live out everyday in light of our own thoughts alone. If I really want to know about myself I often need to ask some other people. Of course these need to be solid Christian people I trust for it to be helpful. Do you have the courage to ask your parents if you are a good child? Do you have the courage to ask your spouse if you are truly a good spouse? Do you have the courage to ask your children about your parenting? Do you have that courage to ask your co-workers if you are a good Christian example? What about other Church members? Your pastor? Your neighbor? Anyone?

There is this possibility that I may have some areas I have been avoiding that need real work. There is also this possibility that I am being to hard on myself. Maybe the truth is somewhere in between. One thing I know for certain, don’t trust yourself alone seek the input of others. In the long run, you will be glad you did.