The boundaries have been ever expanding. When he was born I didn’t want to let him out of my sight. When he was a toddler, I couldn’t let him out of my sight. When he began to ride a bike and venture out on his own, we would say, “Stay where I can see you.” Frequently we had to add in the phrase, “If you can’t see me, then I can’t see you.”
With every passing phase the boundaries expanded a little more. I didn’t sleep the first night he was out late in his car. I have lied in the bed quietly listening for the texts to come or the door to open. And to this point it has always arrived. Almost every night he has slept under my roof and I knew he was safe.
Today, all of that changes. As I drop my oldest son off at college I know a pain I have never felt before. No longer will he play where I can see him. He will be off on his own adventures far away from the comforts of home.
I really am okay with this but the separation is hard. I have prayed, planned and prepared for this day. It still feels like I am loosing a part of myself. The pain will linger as I wait for every text, call or visit. I don’t want to let him out of my sight but I know he must go.
I am proud of my son. He is a big man with a soft heart. He loves and feels deeply. He will touch people and be a great adult. Today as I drop him off. I ask the God of heaven to guide, guard and direct his life until I see him again.