Illusion of Control

While my wife was driving through the mountains of Colorado, I would reach up and grab the handle above the door. These pieces of vehicles are technically called assist handles, referred to as grab handles, or have a colorful nickname. Their primary purpose is to help people pull themselves up when getting out of an automobile. A second use is by passengers when they are nervous. 

Not only did I grab the handle while she was driving narrow mountain roads along enormous cliffs, but I also took my right foot and kept stomping an imaginary break on the passenger side. If I felt we were a little too close to the side of the road or were going too fast to maneuver an upcoming bend, I would push my foot into the floorboard while holding tightly to the grab handle. 

You need to know that my wife is a great driver. She has never had a significant accident that required us to contact the law or the insurance. On the other hand, I have created numerous mistakes that resulted in us paying thousands of dollars in damages. There is really not a single reason for me to doubt her ability. 

The problem is not my wife’s driving; the issue is me. I am a control freak. I like to feel in charge of every situation. I want success and failure in my hands, even if I am not the most competent in the vehicle. I grab the handle and stomp the floor to gain some form of control in a situation where I feel totally out of control. In reality, my efforts are an illusion.

Often this is exactly like our relationship with God. We have no reason to doubt him. His track record is flawless. Yet, instead of trusting him and going along for a ride. I grab at anything that will give me the illusion of control.

True faith is letting go of the things we think will help us on our journey and completely trusting the driver.    

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