Early Sunday morning January 8, 2017, Freddie Lewis Harris, my father passed away in his sleep. Over the last two years, he had suffered two major strokes and several “minor” strokes. The last one hit the Friday before Christmas. His health steadily decreased until the Lord called him home.
He was my father, Pappy to my children, mentor, and friend. I will miss him in every way. I look forward to seeing him in heaven again one day. Love you, Poppa.
I am doing something different for 2017. Every weekend I am going to post some of the best and most helpful articles I have read in the past week. Sometimes this will be only one or two pieces and other times it may be several. I would just like to share what I am reading every weekend in 2017. Hope you enjoy.
I KNOW WHY YOUR CHURCH DID (OR DIDN’T) CANCEL CHRISTMAS
John MacArthur’s Ten Crucial Lessons We Must Teach our Children
Christmas is one of the biggest holidays on the Christian calendar. Yet, in my Church, once Christmas is over the decorations go up, and we don’t think much about Jesus until Easter. Some Churches do have special days set aside to think about Jesus after his birth. One of those events is called Epiphany. It happens 12 days after Christmas and is part of the Christian liturgical plan.
Observed on January 6th, the Epiphany celebration remembers the three miracles that manifest the divinity of Christ. The name “Epiphany” comes from the Greek word Epiphania, and means “to show, make known, or reveal.” The celebration originated in the Eastern Church in AD 361, beginning as a commemoration of the birth of Christ. Later, additional meanings were added – the visit of the three Magi, Christ’s baptism in the Jordan River, and his first miracle at the wedding in Cana. These three events are central to the definition of Epiphany, and its meaning is drawn from these occurrences.
Today is the day believers celebrate the revelation of Jesus as the Savior of the world. He did not accomplish anything on this day. It is just a time set aside to remember who we believe was really born on Christmas.
I hope today that you set aside a few minutes and think about Jesus. Think about his coming. Think about his life and work. Think about his character. Think about God dwelling in flesh among us. Today our Church may not have a big celebration, but that does not mean that you cannot recognize it in your heart. In fact, I strongly encourage it.
Pastors are human, and sometimes our lives get difficult too. Right now, I am going through a difficult time as my dad’s health continues to get worse. The strokes have taken a toll on his body, and we are facing an uncertain future. The only difference for me is that I am living this reality out in front of my congregation. Here is what I see happening when I, as a Pastor, am going through this personal struggle.
1. I Am Distracted
I know this seems obvious in some ways, but I need to say it. God has blessed me with a tremendous memory, and lately, I find myself forgetting things. Last Sunday I checked my phone right before I walked on stage just to make sure there were no new messages about dad. I am making frequent phone calls and trying to keep focused in a tough time. I apologize if I forget something or come off as distracted.
2. I Am Repeating Myself
I am trying to keep people informed, and I forget who I have told what. If you hear me say the same thing to you two or three times, I am sorry.
3. I Am Trying to Keep People Updated Without Drawing Undo Attention
I am not the only one going through a tough time. We have several people sitting in the chairs each week who are on the verge of loss or already on the other side. I want them to have the same care and concern I am receiving. Everyone who is hurting in the Church should get the attention they deserve, not just the Pastor.
4. I Am Emotional
I know I am going to break down crying multiple times in the future. I hope it is not in a sermon, but it could happen. I am a deeply feeling person who is losing his father and one of his best friends. It is not easy as many of you know. I simply cannot predict when I will break down.
5. I Am On Call And Can’t Know the Future.
I have decided not to run back to see dad or help mom right now. I am waiting until I am really needed. The result is that one Sunday I will just up and disappear. The elders and deacons have given me free rein to do what is necessary, and I sincerely appreciate it. It may happen in a week or a month or several months. I know one day I will run off and it will affect the Church here in some ways, please be understanding.
6. I Appreciate Your Prayer, Just Like Anyone Else.
I want you to pray for every need in the Church, this time I just want my family added to the list. Please pray for dad’s transition to heaven. Mom in this tough time. Prayer for me and my brother and sister. There are also seven grandkids including my four sons. All prayers are appreciated.
This experience is a first for me in ministry. I am feeling my way along and asking for God’s guidance. I also ask that you would be kind and compassionate to me through this time as I would hope you would do for anyone in my situation.
Usually, when we think of making this year better, we begin by adding something of value to our normal routine. We are going to start frequenting the gym or adding healthy food to our diet. We will start reading the Bible or praying each day. We believe that improvement comes with addition.
I want to suggest to you that growth also comes through subtraction. There are some things I need to remove from my life to make it better.
1.Removal of Time Wasting Practices
Some of you need to take a break from social media. Some of you need to reduce the amount of TV you watch. How many people have sat down at their computer to check out a couple of things on the internet and then realized that several hours had passed? Is it possible that some of the things you are doing are not making your life better they are simply wasting time?
2. Removal of Negative Thoughts
How many times have you heard that faint whisper in your ear telling you something negative? Either something like, “You will fail” or “You are not good enough to do that.” Our thoughts direct our paths, and some of us have been listening to the negative voices in our head for too long. It is time to change the pattern of your mind.
3. Removal of Certain People
It is possible that you have people in your life who are not helping you achieve the best for your life? There are those people who pull us down with their negative behaviors and words. We might not be able to completely remove those people from our lives, but maybe they need to be moved to the margins. Is it possible that you need to spend less time with a few people to improve your attitude and habits?
4. Removal of Anything Ungodly
I truly believe that God has our best interests in mind through his word. He continually tells us in his word to remove several things like anger, rage, gossip, and slander. The New Testament calls these things the “works of the flesh.” They are part of our old life before we came to Jesus and as believers, we are now called to remove them. They are actions that hurt us along with the people around us.
What would you add to my list?
I often talk to people, and they know exactly what is holding them back in their lives. They know they need to quit doing something or remove someone, but they do not do it. What would happen if you did that one difficult thing you have been dreading for years? What if you purged that thing from your life that would enable you to grow and improve?
Sometimes we should cut the rope to free us from the anchor that holds us in place and doesn’t allow us to move forward.
Why not this year?
I am thankful that God has given me one more year of life. I feel this way every year at the start of January. I am excited for what lies ahead, but I am also thankful for what lies in the past. God gave me one more year to live, love, make a difference and prepare for eternity.
As I reflect on the past year, I have a series of questions that come to mind.
Do I know more about God than I did one year ago?
Do I understand more of what the Bible is teaching than I did a year ago?
Did I connect with people on a deeper level over the past year?
Did I lead anyone into a relationship with Jesus over the last year?
Whom did I serve in the last twelve months?
What project or program did I help grow through my local Church?
Were my ideas and opinions shaped by my faith, even more, this year?
Have I grown spiritually at all in the past year?
Am I different from just one year ago?
Am I better than I was a year ago?
I know these are hard questions to ask and some are even harder to get a clear answer. Despite the difficulty, I still think we need to ask some big questions about the past year.
Then we need to take the answers that we find and use them to fuel us into the future. Ask yourself, “How can I make this year even better for me spiritually than last year?”
If God gives us one more year, then you will be sitting here 365 days from now and evaluating our life once again. What plans need to be made now? What actions do you need to start? What do you need to do so that one year from today you will be more like Christ than you are today?
It took just a few hours.
At midnight, I celebrated the New Year by taking a picture of my children drinking sparkling grape juice. I was tired and immediately went to bed. I woke up late and went to Church. All in all, it was a good morning.
I had started the year off in a great way. Family and faith are foremost on my list of important things for 2017. I had started well and knew this was going to be the best year ever. To reinforce my thinking, I saw all these posts on Facebook telling me about the enormous opportunities of the new year. I had twelve perfect hours and was sure this year was going to be better than all the others.
Then it happened. I sinned.
I will spare you the embarrassing details. Who am I kidding? I will spare myself the embarrassment of telling you the depth of my depravity. But there I was, less than 24 hours into the new year and my heart and mind had betrayed me. I was left a victim to the sin that lives in my heart that I was hoping would not visit the new year.
One day and I had already failed my God.
Then it hit me. This year will be like every other year. I do not mean that I will sit idly by and let sin run my life. I will fight hard against the evil that invades my life. I hope this year is full of change and improvement in my walk with God. I do mean that this year I will be completely dependent on the grace and mercy of God, just like every year before this one.
Even though the calendar has changed and I have made new commitments for the coming year I still live needing God’s forgiveness. I need grace in my thoughts and my actions. The new year reminds me that no matter how much I grow, change or improve, I still need to embrace God’s love and mercy in my life each and every day.
Another year is coming to a close. I want everyone to know that I appreciate you reading my blog and I hope you find it helpful. I know some of you are new to reading it and some of you have been longtime readers. I want to close the years out by sharing some of my most view entries over the years of writing this blog. I hope you enjoy.
From 2013
From 2014
From 2015
My Life as An Introvert Pastor
From 2016
1. Breaking it Down to Build it Back Up
Thanks for reading and I will see you next year.
The other day I sat down and took a little mental inventory of the year.
-My oldest boy was a senior. This was a first for me. This year included his final basketball game in High School.
-My third son broke his ankle in 4 places and needed surgery. First surgery in our family.
-My dad had a second major stroke. Things spiraled down, and we thought we were going to lose him in July, but he battled back. Recently he has been losing ground again.
-Graduation day came along with a reception to celebrate the day.
-My mom got an infection called C-diff and has been in the hospital a couple of times.
-We went on a family vacation for the first time in years. One week is just not enough. We did get to see the Holy Land of Green Bay, Wisconsin, and Lambeau field.
-My Church hired a new office administrator. Gus became a secretary and an extremely helpful assistant.
-My mom discovered she had cancer and needed scans. Finally, she received radiation treatment. Her last checkup showed everything doing well.
-I served as a VBS director. First time in 17 years.
-I bought a used boat for fishing. Tried to spend some time on the water.
-Canceled my next vacation and made a few trips to help my parents in Indiana.
-Took a son to college. Another first for our family. Cried most of the way home.
-Put his younger brother into his senior year. After numerous college visits this fall, we think he has landed on attending Drury University in Springfield Missouri.
-My Church hired a new children’s minister after six months of searching and praying. She has been an enormous asset to our Church and our children.
-My second son had surgery on a torn meniscus. Missed part of senior football season but still did well when he played.
-Another football season for three boys finished and in the books. The final football game for another senior boy. Done with Jr. High football forever.
-Thanksgiving in Indiana with the family.
-An exhausting two-month Jr. High basketball season. Final games of Jr. High basketball and football are in the books. Next year everyone is in High School or college.
-Another Christmas season at Church. Presents and programs are all done.
-New Year’s Day is on the way.
It exhausts me just thinking about it. This year has had its share of ups and downs. It has left me tired and emotional at times.
Two Biggest lessons God has taught me this year.
1. Love your family while you are able. We are quickly losing dad on one side, and my boys are leaving home on the other side. Our days are always numbered with the people we love. Live accordingly.
2. You never know what tomorrow brings. I asked my staff at Christmas if they ever dreamed of living in Adrian Missouri a year ago, both responded with a firm “no.” One son broke his ankle jumping up for a basketball, and the other tore his meniscus jumping in a pool (we think). Life is full of twist and turns, and you are never really prepared for what happens next.
Some years are lived with both hands holding tight to God. For me, it was one of those years. While things are frequently difficult, God is good, and my faith has grown. I hope 2016 was good to you. I especially hope 2017 is better for all of us.
I love the Church. I find it to be the greatest community in the world. All over the globe, there are little clusters of believers who gather together to learn, to grow spiritually, to serve, to love one another and to love God. These groups are usually full of people who are kind, gentle and full of grace and mercy. I love the Church.
I love it so much that I became a leader. I spent five years in Bible college, went on a mission’s internship and started a career totally dependent on the people of the local Church. I have lived as a leader of God’s people for over 23 years now. This is my life, and it is all I have planned for my future. I have often told my wife that I will preach until I can’t remember what to say.
With all that said, can I be brutally honest? Some days I get tired of the Church.
I have a friend who went to Bible college with me. He tried to be a Church leader, and after about ten years he quit. Now he is not a Church leader and is not attending a gather of believers anywhere. I asked him about it, and he says, “I left it years ago, and I have never been happier.” Unfortunately, I completely understand what he means.
First – I get tired of Church programming.
We are just coming off the Christmas season. I make no pretense; this season is so repetitious to me. Year after year of the same stories, decorations and holiday small talk. As a Church leader and Church member, I must come up with new ways of doing the same thing year after year. Whenever Christmas is over, I am exhausted. Then I wake up and know Easter is coming, then Mother’s Day, then Father’s Day, then VBS, then a fall series, then Thanksgiving and finally back to Christmas. Once it is over, it starts again. It is like an endless treadmill of the same routine.
Second – I get tired of some Church people.
I know this sounds harsh coming from a pastor, but I said I was going to be brutally honest. There are some people who wear me out. These come in various forms. On one side, there is the group of needy people. They always have something wrong. They always need help in one form or another, and they always want to talk. On the other side, there are the disappointing people. People who I thought would stand beside me and help in ministry but decide some other activity is more worth their time. I thought they would help me with the programs and they are just a bunch of talk with no action. There are those people who have hurt my children’s faith by their lousy Christian example. Finally, there are those people who I thought were growing in their faith and one day leave the Church and never return. Quite often these people see me in town and turn the other way or ignore me altogether.
There are some weeks I sit in my office and wonder why God called me to lead his people. I dream of walking out and never coming back. I go to work at an ice cream store, and everyone is thrilled to see me.
In these moments, God calls me back to reality.
First – God reminds me who people are really rejecting.
Ministry is very personal, and when someone walks away from God, it feels like they are walking away from me. I need to be continually reminded that God is grieving over certain people far more than I am. They are rejecting God. I am just a messenger.
Second – Hope glimmers in the distance.
Ministry is a long-term occupation. Rarely is a real impact made in one year or five years or possibly even a decade. I think of what my life was like just nine years ago, and realize I am different person today. People may walk away, disappoint or even curse me, but that does not mean that the story is over for them. Their transformation into Christlikeness will take a lifetime.
Third – There are still lots of great people in the Church.
My tendency is to focus on the draining programs, needy people or disappointing experiences instead of all the good things in the Church. While those exist, there are also some wonderful, caring people who do stand beside me. There are people who stand up for what is right in the face of evil. There are people filled with love for others while some are self-absorbed. There are friends who are praying for me when others curse me. There are wonderful men and women who love God and the Church right along with me. I need to see these people more clearly in my life and faith.
The honest and often brutal truth is that many pastors and Church leaders and even longtime Christians feel the way I do this week. We are tired of the Church. We feel like sleeping in next Sunday and who knows what next year may bring. This may be the year I just give it all up. If you are part of that group, let me beg you to hold and see the good in the Church. Together we will stand until Jesus calls us home.
Second Chance Pastor 