If you do not read “This is Indexed” you should because of pictures like this –

The theme for our DIVE children’s ministry this month is creativity and the image for the series is a blank slate. It made me think of this blog that I write. Everyday I sit down to write I am greeted with a blank area to fill in with the words on my mind. I am somewhat prepared for it each day as I keep a file with blog ideas. I now have roughly 38 ideas in my file bank that I can draw upon, but often I just go with what is in my head at the time.

The great part of the blank page is that sometimes we can create something powerful. I receive emails and comments and people are talking about a post weeks later. The difficult part of the blank page is that sometimes we create something way less than powerful. I am amazed to see how some of my posts get over 100 hits and others only 15. Honestly, I want them all to be powerful but that never seems to happen. So what do I do? I just keep writing to the best of ability. I try to fill the page with what God is lying on my heart or what I have noticed in scripture and in life. I continually ask God to fill my blank page with something of value.

That makes me think about life. Each day we are given 1440 blank minutes to use. Each year we are given 525949 minutes. In a 70 year lifetime we are given 36,816,430 minutes. All of them are blank and we can choose what we do with them. Most of us have the information to do do the right thing. We have the potential to do something great. So my continual encouragement to people is simple: Make that call, send that letter or email, say those words you need to say, offer up that prayer, read, linger long with other people, love, think, write and do whatever needs to be done today. Not every action will be received well and some things will simply be ignored. That’s okay. The people with the greatest impact in this world do not succeed in every action. Their success is found in the fact that they just keep acting. The result of a lifetime of trying to do good will be a life well lived and in the process there will be days no one will ever forget. May today be one of those days.

Years ago I read this quote, “The devil does not need an advocate. People need encouragement and not critics” by business thinker Seth Godin on his blog.

Every time I get into a negative place in my thinking about other people I have to remind me of this truth.

They Bible has a lot to say about encouraging and nothing about criticism.

Which will I chose today? How about you?

This week I have blogged about the Pastor’s wife and the Pastor’s kids, so my final post in this vein will answer, “What’s it like to be a pastor?” Well, I can only answer that question for myself but most pastors and preachers that I speak with usually share similar ideas.

1. I feel really inadequate. Sure I grew up in the Church, went to Bible College and I am in the Bible reading and studying 6 days a week – but I am talking about GOD. That is huge. Does anyone ever feel like they have all the answers and have explored this topic completely. Okay, maybe in my 20’s I thought I had everything figured out but who doesn’t at that age? We worship an all-powerful, all-knowing God who can do anything He wants at any time. I am a small speck on the planet and I usually feel the weight of that when I speak and teach.

2. I struggle with Christians. I wish this one were not true. In fact, I thought that people in the Church would be these Christlike people who loved and were filled with joy all the time. Unfortunately all of us are being transformed into Christlikeness and there is a lot of ugliness that can come along the way. I really think the problem comes down to the fact that in the Church we expect better actions but it just doesn’t always happen. I struggle with the hypocrisy, back stabbing, annoying and difficult people as much as you do. I live with the reality that people can feel the same way about me.

3. I feel incredibly lonely most of the time. This might shock you, but I have heard it from preachers time and time again and I have felt it deeply myself. Lots of people talk to me, but most people want to talk about themselves and share their struggles. I am glad to listen to them and pray for their situation but that is not how a friendship works. A friendship is a give and take thing. You speak and you listen. The times I have opened up, my wife and kids too, it has frequently come back to bite us later. We open our hearts up about a struggle, sin or feelings about others and later that info is made public to hurt and humiliate us. Real relationships take years to form and it can be a lonely time until those are established.

4. I get tired of preaching. I love to preach. I love seeing people understand something new. I love seeing the light come on as an idea finally clicks in their head. With that said, the last 6 years I have preached 49-51 times a year and it can be draining. It is hard to come up with creative, educational and entertaining messages every week. Vacations are wonderful but short-lived because Sunday is always coming.

5. I do not know what to do with personal praise. I am glad that people like my sermons and hopefully are learning from them. I am glad they tell me the impact they are feeling, but I honestly do not know how to feel about it. I simply want two things in my ministry: Peoples lives transformed by obedience to the gospel. People to give glory to God.
Don’t get me wrong, I loved to be encouraged, but I am never exactly sure how to feel about it.

I know that all of these observation start with the word, “I” and it feels self-indulgent and self-serving. I hope it does not come off that way. I just want you to know part of this pastor’s soul and possibly every pastor you know. Maybe it will help you to relate to this unique group of Church leaders in a new way. Maybe it will help the Church be a place where love and grace flow to all – even Pastors.

[Again. NO comments will be posted]

I cannot imagine what it must be like to be a pastor’s kid. I watch it from a close proximity but am still not sure what it is like. Some days my children do well with it and other days it is a struggle. They have the challenges of any normal teenager or pre-teen boy. Their life if different because they live in this fishbowl of Church leadership. Everyone knows their name, they see their actions and they hear the rumors about everything they do. I am sure it must be hard to live under the watchful eye of everyone while still trying to be a normal young man. I think my boys have handled it with grace and dignity, at least as far as I know:-)

While I know their life is not perfect I have noticed a few things that have been a blessing to our wacky life.

1. Accountability is not an option. When you live in a fishbowl you know everyone is watching. While this is a difficulty to some it is also a strange blessing. My boys know that their life and choices affect more people than just themselves. How would life be different if every young person understood the impact of their choices?

2. Ministry is expected. In the early days my boys got up with me at 5:00 am to help set up for our new Church in Iowa. Today they still help with setting up or tearing down for various events, they help with worship and are a part of almost everything going on at Church. They know they following Jesus means serving Him and not sitting in a chair doing nothing.

3. All people are valuable. My boys have been able to spend time with everyone from little kids to senior adults. They have spent time with those people who have special needs and those who are just … well … special. They have sat in with people of all ages, all types and all backgrounds. I love watching my boys interact with any age group at any time.

4. The enormous need for grace. My boys have seen some people at their best but they have also seen them at their worst. They have heard my horror stories of failures and disgrace. In those situations they have heard me speak of grace, pray for grace and celebrate grace. I hope it is burned in their mind that all of us need the grace of God offered through the cross. All of us.

I don’t know if any of this helps you with your parenting or grand parenting but these are the lessons in my life. I know my boys are not perfect and I do not expect them to be. I know their life can be hard and not much fun, but I am okay with that. My hope and prayer for my kids – and for your kids – is that they grow up to Christ following adults who will spend eternity with me in heaven.

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My wife did not ask me to write this, in fact she will be mad at me because I did. But I accept that fact as I write these words because they need to be said. I was looking at my calendar and next month is Pastor Appreciation month. It is a month I feel incredibly awkward about personally. I kind of feel like weird uncle Larry who gets invited to the party not because anybody wants him there but because he is family and we have to invite him. I also feel strange about it because I get paid to be a pastor. God has blessed me richly with a weekly paycheck to do what I do. So I want to turn the tables for a minute and focus on the greatest volunteer I know in the Church – the Pastor’s wife.

From the outside it looks to be the most incredibly intense volunteer position in the Church. She is an intricate part of my ministry just by being married to me. She didn’t ask for this position, she didn’t apply for the job, she just inherited it by choosing to marry me. As a result of that one poor choice she wrapped herself up in the ministry of the Church deeper than anyone I have ever encountered. She loves and teaches other people’s kids. She tells me I had a good sermon, even when I know it was awful. She learned to play guitar just to help my ministry as a worship leader. She makes sure my children are involved in ministry. She encourages other people every chance she gets. She invites numerous people to Church. She spends her free time listening to me talk about Church and ministry. Her vacations have have often included church conferences or visiting a large Church “to see what they are doing.” She has shared her husband on a thousand nights with strangers whose lives are falling apart. She has never missed a Sunday because she was sick. She has followed me across the country in 6 different ministries. She volunteers hundreds of hours that no one ever sees. She leads, organizes, copies and cleans. I literally could spend page after page telling you of all the wonderful things she does.

On the flip side, for me it appears to be the most inglorious and thankless job on the planet. I have seen her endure things no one else has ever had to endure. I have watched her service go unnoticed and unappreciated for years. I have heard people criticize her without caring how she felt. I have seen her heart get ripped out as people devalued her friendship. I have wept for her as her dreams go unrealized. I have seen the hurt of a thousand disappointments. I have held her when she felt all alone though surrounded by people. Once again I could tell you pages of stories about the pain, heartache and misery she has endured just by being a Pastor’s wife.

I write all of this because I do not need your appreciation. I am called by God into this thing called ministry and Churches have been wonderful enough to pay me. My wife is a volunteer and she did not ask for her position but I thank God daily that I have her by my side. I appreciate and love her and I cannot thank God enough for her. I am sure that every minister feels the same.

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Last Saturday I had two polar opposite experiences. I went to a conference at Ozark Christian College where I graduated in 1995. I haven’t been back to the campus since 2000. There have been a number of changes in the last 14 years. The chapel has had dramatic overhaul of the stage, carpet, seating and entryway. The I walked over to the building that used to be the book store and administration building. Now it is a really nice student center and a brand new bookstore. I could spend a lot of time writing about all the positive changes I saw on the campus and I only saw a few buildings.

After the conference my wife and I drove back toward Adrian and we took a little detour to where we lived right after we were married. In 1995 the two of us made our home in a little community where I had my first “full-time” preaching ministry. The Church put us up in an older house that a lady in the Church owned but she was now living in a nursing home. We arrived in the town and drove by the old Church building that looked about the same. Then we made a left and a right and there sat the old home. I am not exaggerating when I say that it has turned into a dump. The house has not been painted in 20 years, many of the windows were boarded up and there was junk all over the lawn. One window was crammed full of stuff like stuffed animals so someone must be living there. It appears no improvements have been made since the days we lived in it. As a result, it was now a house that should be condemned.

On one hand I saw a place that was changing and improving every year. On the other hand I saw a place that was unchanged and was deteriorating with every year. It was the fitting end to a day when I had visited the college for a conference on making changes in the local Church. We either change for the better or we deteriorate for the worse. Nothing stays the same – not colleges, houses, Churches or even people. My hope for my ministry is that I would be an influence for positive change wherever I go. I hope in 20 years I will not revisit a Church I have led and see a dump instead of place of discipleship.

I was watching an old episode of Law and Order on the TV the other night. The police were dealing with a radical extremist who happened to believe he was following God. What was interesting to me is that he was following the God of different religion and when questioned about it he said we are “One nation under God.” Now in my brain I take those words and I interpret them to mean “the God of the Bible.” This person did not hear it the same way.

All this had me thinking about a sermon I heard years ago from a great preacher. He talked about the generic God of America. He spoke of how we often refer to God in many different settings without making anyone upset. If someone believes differently they can just substitute in the name of their Deity for the word God. In this sermon he noted how different it is to say “I believe in God” and “I believe Jesus is God.” But at the heart of Christianity that is what we believe. We can nod in agreement with “In God We Trust” but we would get a much different reaction if we said “In Jesus We Trust.”

If you don’t believe me take a couple of weeks and test it out. Say to your family, friends and coworkers something about God and see how they react. Then the next week make similar statements about Jesus and see if their reaction is different. You might be shocked at the different reactions.

Don’t get me wrong. I believe in God. I simply believe that He came to earth in the person of Jesus of Nazareth. My God did not speak generically into the word He came personally so that we could know and understand Him. Personally, I think it is important for Christians to be clear about what we believe. Lots of people have some type of faith in a generic god but I have faith in Jesus as my God and my Savior. There is a world of difference.

Last Saturday I attended a conference at Ozark Christian College (my Alma Matter) about leading a Church through change. While the conference itself was good I began writing lessons and ideas in the margin of my notes. I ended up with several random lessons that I have no idea what to do with so I thought I would share them here. Maybe one will resonate with you …maybe not.

1. I am not a modern pastor. I looked around at several of the younger to middle-aged pastors and realized I do not fit in. Most of them had their head shaved, wore thick rimmed glasses, had a thin build and a button up shirt to show it off. They carry Mac computers and use cool looking smart phones. I looked in the mirror and realized that the fact I am balding is as close to them I as get. I believe part of life is figuring out who you are, but also who you are not. I am not cool or hip or whatever word people use these days.

2. I miss Church pews. The auditorium at Ozark is now filled with theater type seats. They are nice enough to sit in but I noticed one huge flaw. When the chapel (or Church) had pews you could create a buffer zone around you. Do you know what I am talking about? I would place my Bible to my left and other papers to my right and people knew not to get to close. In chairs, people sit right next to you because that is how they are designed. I need my space. I miss you church pew.

3. The wisdom of outside voices. When you are involved in any situation you tend to become focused on a few ideas and miss other ideas. That is why a counselor or consultant are so vital. We need someone outside of our situation to speak truth to us. This is also the hardest to hear because they do not know the rest of the story. What would people say you should change if they watched your life for a few days?

4. Great speaking doesn’t need PowerPoint. Our speaker for the conference was Jeff Walling. He is an extremely gifted speaker. He tried to use a PowerPoint presentation with his message to enhance it. It was a distraction. While I appreciate technology I want to stand up and say, “It is not always necessary.” I would rather have no technology than technology that is poorly done.

5. The idea of change is easy to accept, a transition is hard. Okay, this one came right from the conference. He actually said this statement or something like it numerous times. He spoke of the dream of leaving Egypt for Israel was a great idea, but getting to the Promise Land was something else. This is true of change in the church but it is also true of all change. A wedding is easy and a marriage is hard. A birth is exciting and raising a child is stressful. Wanting to quit a bad habit is powerful and actually quitting is extremely difficult. Wanting a better life or church or marriage or anything is a great step but making it happen is a long difficult process of change.

That is it for now. I hope something in there touched your heart or mind. I know I was challenged and encouraged on Saturday and now comes the tough part of doing:-)

I have been thinking a great deal about preaching and teaching lately. You have probably noticed this in my last weeks blog posts. Well, I am going to add one more to the list of posts on this topic. This idea hit me while praying before my last sermon. Literally every time I speak I take the time to pray in private before I take the stage. I will not tell you all of that prayer, but I am going to tell you one thing that I say repeatedly.

When I was in my first year of full-time preaching ministry I expressed to a preacher who was a bit older than me my feelings of inadequacy when I preach. You see I know my sins intimately. I know my moments where my faith lapses and I do some ungodly action every week. I know my shortcomings, my failures, the holes in my faith, the questions that haunt my soul and my feelings of faithlessness. Surprisingly he identified with my feelings and thoughts. He struggled with the same things. His life was sometimes lived contrary to his preaching. First, this was a shock to me. I thought he had it altogether. Second, he explained to about the funnel.

He said, “I view my life like a dirty old funnel.” He explained to me that a funnel has only one purpose. It is used to transfer an important item, like gas, to a place where it is needed. A funnel can be greasy on the outside, stained with the oils of use, but that does not make it useless. In fact, the value has nothing to do with how it looks as long as it serves its function. Then he took out a piece of paper and drew a funnel on it and he told me that he pictured it like this. God is full of goodness and truth and my job in preaching is to take those enormous ideas and funnel them into the lives of people. It doesn’t matter if I am stained as long as I get the message from God and get it to the people. He illustrated his point with several Bible characters like Abraham who lied about his wife, Moses who got angry, David who committed adultery and Paul who was a murderer.

His talk made sense to me. I am not the point of preaching, I am simply a dirty funnel God uses to convey his message. So every time I speak I literally pray the words, “God use me like that dirty funnel.” I have been saying that prayer for almost 20 years now and I am amazed each week that God continues to use me in spite of myself. It is amazing what God can do when we open up our life to Him no matter where we have been or what we have done. Be the funnel.