“I am never going back there again!”

I will never eat, shop, visit, or spend my money there ever again.

We have all said that about someplace. The service was terrible, and the experience was upsetting. So we decided that we were going to protest that place. We severed our relationship and walked away forever.

Of course, this will get mentioned when other people plan to visit that establishment. Then we will vocalize our disdain for that place to sway other people’s opinions. Even now, we can feel our blood boil whenever that place is mentioned.

We do this with people too.

The interaction did not go the way we wanted it to go. They made you angry and didn’t seem to care. Finally, you are so frustrated with them that you swear, “I will never have anything to do with them again.” 

With that, you began your personal protest against that person. Now, whenever anyone speaks of them, you tell your unpleasant story and try to sway other people’s opinions. Quite often, we feel justified in our frustration and believe everyone else should feel the same way.

I understand this outside the Church, but inside the community of the Lord’s people, this should not happen. Paul writes to the Church in the city of Colossae, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” (Colossians 3:13 – NIV 2011)

Maybe it is time to drop your picket sign, give up your personal protest and find the forgiveness that is needed.

What I know now.

I would make different mistakes.

It is easy to sit back and second-guess your decisions. We each know so much more about the situation than we did when it happened. We see the dynamics of the exchange. The consequences are clear. The long-term results have been experienced.

So maybe you would make that one decision better. But then you would experience the same lack of knowledge about other things. And you would simply make a different poor choice.

There is no use in replaying the past in your mind and thinking about all the ways you would do life differently. It is only helpful to work on the future carefully. To take all of your wisdom and apply it to today’s choices.

Then one day, you can look back on what happened now and be happy with all you have done.

You can tell me the most important things in your life right now. You can vehemently declare your love for the Lord. You might explain how much you value your marriage or family. You could even tell me about your love of the Church and the work that it does. You may believe that you have built a life that is God-honoring in almost every way.

I think two things serve as proof of your claims: your watch and your wallet.

One way to test your priorities is to determine where you spend your time and money.

If I looked over your schedule, would I see that you have spent adequate time doing the things you claim are important to you? If I scrolled through your bank statement or credit card bill, would I see that your use of money supports your priorities?

Wherever your time and money goes is what you genuinely value, no matter how much you state something different.

Does adding more Bible verses to a sermon or lesson make it more valid?

Does adding verses out of context make a sermon or lesson more Biblical?

Adding verses, perhaps numerous ones, out of context and with little explanation may sound good, but often it adds little to the overall content of the material.

Biblical messages honestly handle the Bible within its historical and theological context. They walk through the literary and immediate context in which it is written. They ask questions about the material and listen with open hearts and minds to what God is teaching us through that text.

A lady once told me she was going to another Church because the preacher there was more Biblical in his preaching. I curiously asked what she meant, and she said, “He quotes so much scripture in each sermon.” I smiled and said, “I pray you will be blessed there,” but I felt like saying, “Quoting more verses does not make it more Biblical; it just sounds that way.”

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.” – Jesus

All of us know what it is like to be hungry and thirsty. To have that desire to fill our stomachs and quench our thirst. Jesus says that his followers should seek right living with the same intensity.

At the Church, I can preach, other people can teach classes, and we can provide small groups and video lessons for you to learn. The Church can produce all kinds of material to help your spiritual growth.

The only thing we cannot do at the Church is give you the drive to learn. That has to come from you. The food and drink provided by Christians and the Church community are only satisfying if you bring your hunger and thirst.

The Church can only do so much; the rest is up to you.

Recently I heard communications specialist Vanessa Van Edwards say people take two kinds of pills.

One is painkillers, and those are for immediate relief. It is obvious that we have a problem and need help. We don’t need charts or graphs to show why we need to take these pills.

The other type is vitamins. These have no immediate benefit. They are something that will not change our life if we neglect them for a day or two here and there. Sometimes we will even need reminding of their importance to motivate us to take them.

One pill is for today’s problem, and the other is a long-term solution.

Walking in faith as a follower of Jesus has a few painkillers, it is primarily vitamins.

What if that thing you are saying, “I’m not very good at it,” is actually a learned skill?

What if you could learn to have better conversations, even with people you don’t know? What if you could learn to be more social despite being an introvert? What if you could become a better friend and connect with people deeply? What if you could get better at gift giving and possibly gift receiving? What if you could learn the skills to become a better human and a better Christian?

I guess you would have to stop making excuses.

There are skills you can acquire to be a better person, and it is not adequate to say, “I can’t.”

The question is, “Are you willing to learn?”

Yesterday I completed another trip around the sun.

Each year at this time, I take a few minutes to reflect quietly on my life.

I wish I could say I was older and wiser. I really wish I could say that I have everything figured out and know what I am doing.

Yet, none of those wishes are reality. I am older, I have learned a few new things, and I thought I would share twelve random lessons from the past year.

-You make time for the things you value.
-Relationships make life more enjoyable.
-God always has a way of surprising you.
-It is easy to caricature and label people, yet everyone is highly complex and unique.
-God’s timing is never our timing.
-Holding onto grudges is pointless and painful.
-All repairs cost at least twice as much and take twice as long as you plan.
-People also have a way of surprising you.
-Everyone has stories that they do not tell for numerous reasons.
-Many people want to serve the Lord; they are just waiting to be asked.
-God made some parts of this planet incredibly beautiful.
-Caring about people can break your heart, but don’t stop caring.

Recently, a new lady in our Church asked me, “What do you do through the week?” At first, I felt slightly offended, but the longer I thought about it, I understood how she could have no idea. Most of my work is done away from the public eye, so most people have no clue what I do. 

Let me share with you where most of my time goes.

1. Personal Development. My number one priority is my walk with God. I spend time reading my Bible, praying, reading books, listening to podcasts, reading blogs, and in personal reflection. I am a deeply flawed person who relies on God’s grace to get me through every week, and I need to be reminded of God’s truth daily. 

2. Sermon Writing. I spend a few hours on Monday and all day Tuesday writing what I will say on Sunday. It takes research, thought, writing, and rewriting.

3. Church Leadership. I meet with the Church office administrator almost daily, elders’ meetings, staff meetings, board meetings, and ministry meetings. I spend hours planning events, completing projects, ordering supplies, and casting vision with individuals. 

4. People Stuff. I have all kinds of interactions I am involved in every week. These can range from membership class follow-up to senior adult luncheons, wedding planning, Biblical advice, and hospital visits. There is a string of people through my office each week, along with connections made in my home. 

5. Worship planning. I pick out the videos we use in worship along with most of the songs. I work with a group of people who plan Easter, Christmas, and any special event. In addition, I secure people for communion thoughts and any special activities. My wife helps me a lot as the musician in the family, but I spend hours working on what will happen Sunday morning.    

6. Miscellaneous Projects. There are a host of activities that I do not do regularly but manage to fill up my time. Recently, the Church put together a coffee bar. I messaged with people and got advice, was given donations, went to purchase items, and then put it all together. Sometimes I arrange meals or possibly dream about the next thing. I never lack something to fill my time. 

This week I sat down and put all of my notes for projects into a single document, and it filled two whole pages. We live in a time of unlimited opportunities, and I am trying to do as much for the kingdom as possible. I aim to work forty hours weekly and donate 1-10 hours more. I am asking people in the Church to work full-time and serve in their free time. It would be disrespectful to them and dishonoring to my God for me to do any less.       

Alasdair White is often credited with initially using the phrase “comfort zone.” My understanding is that he used it in business management theory. He was trying to get businesses and investors to move away from their familiar ventures into new and unfamiliar areas for greater rewards.

There is disagreement about whether he created or used an already accepted phrase. Either way, it has caught on, and it is hard to go a week without hearing someone say something about getting out of a comfort zone.

We understand that to grow as individuals, we need to get out of our familiar places and habits. For us to make a more significant impact on the world, we need to move beyond the borders of our known existence and head into places that make us uncomfortable.

While we all agree with this premise, very few do it in practice. We like our regular routines because they are comfortable. They make us feel good when the rest of the world is chaotic. Most of us will choose the familiar without hesitation, no matter how often we have said, “I need to get out of my comfort zone.”

Here is one of the amazing things about being a follower of Jesus. If you genuinely try to live for him, you will find that he continually pushes us into situations challenging our comfort. For a Christian, the issue is not, “Am I willing to step out of my comfort zone,” but rather, “Am I willing to follow Jesus wherever he leads?” The first question is about my willingness to take risks, and the second is about my level of faith.