How many mirrors does your house contain? How many times do you look to see yourself in them?

Mirrors can be a useful thing; you can look at them to see if your hair is straight, to see if you have your makeup on correctly or see how your outfit looks. They can be useful tools in your home for all kinds of positive things.

They can also damage your soul. Look too long into a mirror, and suddenly the world becomes about you. How you look can turn into feelings of overconfidence or inadequacy. There is this subtle shift from looking at my outward appearance to making judgments about myself.

The problem really isn’t the mirror itself. The problem is our soul. Spending too much time thinking about yourself in a narcissistic way is damaging. Self-focus primarily leads one of two directions. It either breeds pride or shame. You can think more of yourself and less of other people. The flip side is that you think less or yourself and more of other people.

I firmly believe that God knows our natural tendencies, and so he pushes us to be others focused. He puts us into a community of believers called the Church so that we can see the needs of others. He instructs us to serve others so that we can help those needs. God wants us to see ourselves as part of a greater group that is dependent on one another, and no one part is worth less or more than any other part.

It is okay that you have mirrors in your home just don’t look at them too long or too often. How you see yourself might be a symptom of sin and not a reflection of God’s image in you.

Recently my mother has been at our house, and I have taken a few days off to take her fishing. For those that know me, you know my favorite spot is a series of handicapped accessible fishing docks below the dam at a nearby lake. At certain times of the year, this place is excellent fishing, and it is easy to access, especially with my mom.

I need to tell you that I am an experienced fisherman. Through the years, I have fished in five states and Canada. This includes trips to Lake Erie, the Mississippi and Kenai Rivers, plus the waters that surround Alaska. I spend more hours on the water than my wife likes, but my experience allows me to be successful.

When I go to these docks, I usually come home with a limit of nice crappie and often several catfish. These trips allowed me to have two enormous meals lately and feed people all the fish they wanted. I am truly blessed in my ability to catch fish, and I thank God for that. I am also willing to share my knowledge with anyone who inquires of me.

The past three trips have made me laugh, cry, and question humanity. Repeatedly my mom and I have been catching fish, and someone came up and asked us what we were doing. I have tried to explain to them that we are using slip bobbers. They allow us to fish away from the dock and to fish deep, usually 10-12 feet. I tell them that I prefer live minnows hooked in the back with weights attached about 3-4 inches above the hook. I have gone so far as to offer them free tackle and show them how to use it. Lately, all this information is greeted with the same response of “Hum.” Then they go right back to what they were doing before they asked with no greater success. There I am, offering them advice, showing them it works and I am even willing to help them and they walk away.

All of this has me thinking about the Church and my job as a preacher every week. I try to preach the truth effectively. I try to model that faith in my own life, family, and career. I am willing to do everything possible to help people. And yet, I realize most of the time people walk away and do nothing with it. Most people think they know enough to be good at whatever they do, but real wisdom is knowing enough to change. My experience tells me that the difference between success and failure is not the access to the right information; it is the willingness to change and act differently. Knowledge is only useful when you apply to your life.

Each week the Church community gathers to worship the Lord for around an hour. As the preacher, I have the opportunity to watch the crowd while I preach along with observing their actions during the rest of our time. Through the years, I have noticed several things about the way people worship.

1. The Apathetic. Honestly, several people attend each week that does not want to be there. Often they are family members of more committed believers. Husbands, children and other relatives have no real interest in worship and tolerate it for someone they love. They do not sing, interact, or even listen.
2. The Tired. Some people are just tired on Sunday morning. It can be from work, fun, or family. It used to really upset me when people fell asleep during my sermon, and then I spent a couple of months not preaching. I found that some mornings were difficult no matter who was speaking. Some of these people are one time sleepers, but there is an occasional regular sleeper. Upon investigation, it becomes clear that worship is not a priority for them, and they never try to get rest on Saturday night.
3. The Distracted. Yes, there are occasional unplanned distractions, but for some people, it is a regular occurrence. They bring in their little children and spend the sermon dealing with them and not listening. They make frequent bathroom trips throughout the service. They never wholly invest themselves in worship.
4. The One Hour Worshipper. These people are happy to be at Church, but you can tell it is the only hour they spend with God each week. They are not familiar with the worship songs. The get lost as the sermon goes deeper into scripture. They are lovely people but never allow themselves to move beyond Sunday morning.
5. The Invested. This group comes to Church as an extension of their life. They love to be with the people of God. They sing with joy during the music; they listen carefully and pray intently. They come in with a smile and leave full almost every Sunday morning. There seems to be nothing that separates them from God. Sunday morning is another deposit into their life of faith.

Each week I can usually predict who will say something about the songs or the sermon. I know who will be asleep and who will be taking notes. I know who will spend the week growing from the experience and preparing for the next week. I can tell a lot about you from the way you worship.

What do you think your Sunday morning says about you?

Here are some of the best articles I have read the past few weeks. Enjoy.

Where do you park your car at church?

How to Save Your Marriage Before It’s Lost

WHY DO WE HATE EACH OTHER SO MUCH? (5 REASONS ANGER IS THE NEW EPIDEMIC)

10 THINGS THAT AIN’T CHURCH (SOME THOUGHTS ON IRREGULAR AND DECLINING CHURCH ATTENDANCE)

Saved by Grace But Entertained by Sin

Why Do Dying Men Call for “Mama?”

Embracing your incompetence

It is the time of year when I begin planning my sermon series for the next 18 months. Whenever I start this process, I ask an essential question, “What do the people I lead need to hear the most?” To adequately answer that question, I must evaluate what I see in the lives of the people in my congregations. Here are five observations of the people in my Church, and I think they reflect the greater Christian community I have experienced in the United States.

1. People are Busier Than Ever. A full schedule is the new normal everywhere, including rural communities. I think that there is a two-fold problem that the Church needs to address. First is to teach people the downside of their busyness. Second is to show them the value of using their time wisely and especially for God’s kingdom.
2. In a World Where People Have Tools to Connect More, They Actually Connect Less. Loneliness is becoming an epidemic in modern culture. Men appear to be struggling with this the most. There are several reasons for this, but the more significant issue is how to get all people to develop healthy relationships.
3. Children Are a Huge Priority, but Teens are Not. This one is becoming more and more pronounced the longer I work with teens. Have an event for little kids like VBS, and you can pack the house. Host an activity for teenagers and expect very little parent participation and a handful of teens. Parents are deeply invested in the lives of those children fifth grade and under and have little clue of the struggle’s teens are facing, and even worse, they are rarely being addressed.
4. Men Are Getting Spiritually Weaker. The divide between men and women in their faith seems to be growing wider. Once again, I think there are several reasons for this, but the solution is the bigger question. How do we get men to take their spiritual life seriously? Those who are trying to walk in faith need to be encouraged to lead in their home, Church, and community.
5. There Are More Available Resources, Yet People Know Less. There is an ever-increasing need to teach people the Bible. Not only do people have little Bible knowledge, but much of what they have is inaccurate or incomplete. How do the Church and its leadership help develop more and better disciples?

These are some of the things I am noticing that are shaping the culture of the community in which I live. Is there anything you would add to my list? These concepts will develop my upcoming sermons and leadership through 2020. How are they molding your life and family today?

While in college I carried a cassette tape in my car from Paul Simon. It was a collection of his greatest hits from 1971-1986 called “Negotiations and Love Songs.” The title was a line from his song “Train in the Distance,” where it says “negotiations and love songs are often mistaken for one and the same.” It is a great line that captures the pictures of two people trying to live together in agreement without the existence of love, and they don’t understand the difference.

Recently I was thinking about my prayer life, and a similar line went through my head, “negotiations and prayers are often mistaken for one and the same.” There is the possibility that when we address God, we are trying to get him to do our will. We barter and negotiate when we speak with our maker. We say things like, “God if you give me this, then I will do that.” Our words offer God our obedience in exchange for his omnipotence.

Prayer is about opening our heart up to God and his will. It is an opportunity for us to submit our lives to his leading. We present our needs to God and live with the expectation of him doing his mighty work.

One question I am now asking myself about my prayers is, “Am I seeking God’s will or mine?” Am I trying to negotiate with God instead of offering my prayers? Negotiations and prayers are not one and the same.

Recently I preached a sermon that was a home run. I don’t usually think that way about my sermons as I often teeter between self-loathing and suicidal thoughts in the time after I finish a message. This one was different; it was touching, and everyone agreed it was well delivered. Since I have spoken, there have been dozens of people make comments to me personally and online about how much they enjoyed it, and I must be honest; it scares me to death.

I know as a public speaker the goal is for people to listen and learn from your message while they enjoy your delivery. Being a preacher is a little different. In fact, it is more comfortable for me to deliver a sermon I think is lousy because I know I need God to show up and do something with it. When it goes well, there are other thoughts in my head.

1. I want God to get the glory not me. I am glad people liked my preaching, but if they only see me, then I messed up. I want them to hear about God and his will above my own. I often feel that a great sermon leaves people wanting more of God and not the preacher.
2. Forgetting the Holy Spirit. As a believer, I am convinced that the Holy Spirit of God is what makes preaching work. God takes my words and infuses them with his Spirit so that they touch the heart, mind, and soul of the listener.
3. It was only part of the overall experience. On this particular occasion, several other things happened before I got up to speak. Some songs put people into a mood, and a type of thinking was introduced. There was another speaker who laid the groundwork and the context of what I was going to say. There were also people who prayed before, during and after the event. I got to be the cherry on top of the bowl, the ice cream and the hot fudge.
4. Fear of remembering me and not the message. I am glad people liked what I had to say, but I hope a year from now they remember the passage of the Bible I presented and the essential content of what I had to say.
5. The temptation of my foolish pride. This one is the toughest for me. It feels good when people say nice things about you. Quickly my head begins to swell as people repeatedly praise my work. It is easy to think, “That is right; I am a special person.” Unfortunately, I made a couple of comments I regret in the time since the sermon that showed my prize oozing out. I am only as good as God allows me to be in every situation.

All of this may sound crazy to you, but as a preacher, this has been my struggle recently. I wish it were not true. I really would love to tell you that I am so spiritual that none of this influences me. I am thankful for everyone’s encouragement, and I am trying to learn how to handle it but know it does not come easily.

The pressure has been on high for the past five days. The family arrived, and we had three new people staying in our house. I delivered a Baccalaureate message on Wednesday night. There was a graduation party at our home complete with a meal. We had to set up and then clean up from the same party. We had worship on Sunday morning which included an emphasis on Mother’s Day. Not only was it Mother’s Day, but it was also my mother’s birthday and graduation Sunday. My son gave the Salutatorian speech, and I am not sure if he or I was more nervous. The evening was spent organizing pictures and finalizing the weekend. Finally this morning some of the family left, and I am back in the office for another week of work.

I sit here this morning semi-exhausted and yet full. It has been a great weekend. My sermon went well, and everyone was complimentary. The party was excellent, and we are blessed to have the love and support of so many wonderful people. His speech went great, and everyone had good things to say. We have numerous pictures that make me smile from my son and my family. It was a weekend full of blessing.

One image has often crossed my mind, “What does an Olympic competitor do the day after the competition is over?” Think about it; you have trained for four years in every way for that one big event, and then it is over. What do they do the next day? Do they rest? Do they cry? Do they go back to the gym?

Today I go back to the gym. I have more sermons to write and another son to lead toward graduation. For a few minutes, I want to linger in my mind and think about the last few days. I am a truly blessed man. I have a loving family with an outstanding wife and good boys. I have a special mother. I am a part of a Church that supports and encourages me. Not only has it been a good weekend, but I have a good life. My friend likes to say, “I am too blessed to complain.”

I don’t have anything special to say today, other than this, be sure to take a few minutes regularly to notice all the positives in your life. The pressure of life is ever present but so are the blessings of God.

Occasionally I post something about my family when we are going through a significant life event. This weekend is one of those times. My third son is graduating from high school as salutatorian. His two older brothers finished third in their class, and Dakota made the top two.

Today I want to write a little bit about my son even though you may not know him or care.

1. He is the Mini-Me. When he was little, I would shave once a year, and the resemblance is uncanny. We have many of the same facial features. The more surprising part is that we saw a picture of my dad when he was 16 in a basketball photo. You would not have been able to tell the two apart. He has the Harris’ face. Not only do we bare a similar look, but we also have the same sense of humor, enjoy the outdoors, like similar music and enjoy public speaking. My wife will also tell you that we are both talkers😊

2. He has a big heart to match his smile. He will never know the number of times I have stood back and watched quietly. Little kids will come up to him, and he will listen, and he will talk to them. I know that sometimes it has been challenging to be helpful, but he always tries to have a kind word. He is friendly and courteous as much as possible.

3. He has stretched every boundary. His mother and I have spent more nights worried about that boy. We have prayed for him and asked God to work on him and in him. I am thankful that the Lord put some Godly men in his life at a dark time to help pull him through. He has already learned the need for grace and goodness of God and other people.

4. He loves to laugh. In fact, it is tough to get him to take things seriously. He gets this from me. We both love to drink deep the joy of life and not get stressed over little things. We have enjoyed movies, TV shows, jokes, inside stories, and memes together. I can always count on my buddy for a laugh.

5. I am very proud of him. I hate the word pride because it implies that I did something well. In reality, God gave me this wonderful little boy to raise. It has been a roller coaster ride for over 18 years, and I am delighted with how he turned out. He will always be our Cuda or Coda bug.

This weekend he graduates, and it will be hard to hold back the tears. I am excited about the next chapter of his life, and I pray every day that God will do something powerful through his life. I know he has great things in store. I want the world to know how much I love my son and the joy this weekend gives me.

I love you Dakota

The story of Adam and Eve’s choice to disobey God in Genesis chapter three is a rich story filled with theological significance along with practical application. Upon my last reading of this story, I noticed something I had never seen before.

One of the first blunders in the story is easy to notice. Eve says in Genesis 3:3 “…but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’ ” Eve adds something that is never recorded from the mouth of God. She inserts the phrase, “and we must not touch it.” The rest of her quote is true, but for some reason, she distorts his words, not with an omission but rather an added phrase.

Then comes the part I had not noticed. The story continues in Genesis 3:6 “When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.”

Did you notice that three-word statement? She sees and understands the goodness of the fruit and then she took some. She pulled it off the tree and held it in her hand. Because of her distortion of God’s word, a subtle shift happens. If she thought she would die when she touched the fruit, then her faith was unfounded. She felt it, and nothing happened. If God was wrong about that simple first step, then he was probably wrong about everything. Her twisting of God’s word set her up for failure.

This reminds me of a passage Peter wrote to the Church where he says, “He (The Apostle Paul) writes the same way in all his letters, speaking in them of these matters. His letters contain some things that are hard to understand, which ignorant and unstable people distort, as they do the other Scriptures, to their own destruction. (2 Peter 3:16)” They distort the scripture, other translations say, “twist,” to their own destruction.

One tiny phase composed of six words is the set up for failure. God said I should not touch it and when I did nothing terrible happened immediately. The boundary line was blurred, and the next step was outside of the will of God. Sin entered the world and death came with sin, not just for Eve, but for all of humanity.

We must be cautious with how we handle our scriptures. We must use wisdom and careful study to understand them. Adding a single phase like, “God wants me happy” or, “I can’t change” can distort God’s plan and lead us down a path that ends in destruction.

Eve’s blunder was small in its presence but large in its scope. That is the way sin and temptation work. We must be alert and not fall prey to the schemes of the devil as she did. The pain is not always immediate, but it never fails to arrive.