Each week the Church community gathers to worship the Lord for around an hour. As the preacher, I have the opportunity to watch the crowd while I preach along with observing their actions during the rest of our time. Through the years, I have noticed several things about the way people worship.

1. The Apathetic. Honestly, several people attend each week that does not want to be there. Often they are family members of more committed believers. Husbands, children and other relatives have no real interest in worship and tolerate it for someone they love. They do not sing, interact, or even listen.
2. The Tired. Some people are just tired on Sunday morning. It can be from work, fun, or family. It used to really upset me when people fell asleep during my sermon, and then I spent a couple of months not preaching. I found that some mornings were difficult no matter who was speaking. Some of these people are one time sleepers, but there is an occasional regular sleeper. Upon investigation, it becomes clear that worship is not a priority for them, and they never try to get rest on Saturday night.
3. The Distracted. Yes, there are occasional unplanned distractions, but for some people, it is a regular occurrence. They bring in their little children and spend the sermon dealing with them and not listening. They make frequent bathroom trips throughout the service. They never wholly invest themselves in worship.
4. The One Hour Worshipper. These people are happy to be at Church, but you can tell it is the only hour they spend with God each week. They are not familiar with the worship songs. The get lost as the sermon goes deeper into scripture. They are lovely people but never allow themselves to move beyond Sunday morning.
5. The Invested. This group comes to Church as an extension of their life. They love to be with the people of God. They sing with joy during the music; they listen carefully and pray intently. They come in with a smile and leave full almost every Sunday morning. There seems to be nothing that separates them from God. Sunday morning is another deposit into their life of faith.

Each week I can usually predict who will say something about the songs or the sermon. I know who will be asleep and who will be taking notes. I know who will spend the week growing from the experience and preparing for the next week. I can tell a lot about you from the way you worship.

What do you think your Sunday morning says about you?

Here are some of the best articles I have read the past few weeks. Enjoy.

Where do you park your car at church?

How to Save Your Marriage Before It’s Lost

WHY DO WE HATE EACH OTHER SO MUCH? (5 REASONS ANGER IS THE NEW EPIDEMIC)

10 THINGS THAT AIN’T CHURCH (SOME THOUGHTS ON IRREGULAR AND DECLINING CHURCH ATTENDANCE)

Saved by Grace But Entertained by Sin

Why Do Dying Men Call for “Mama?”

Embracing your incompetence

It is the time of year when I begin planning my sermon series for the next 18 months. Whenever I start this process, I ask an essential question, “What do the people I lead need to hear the most?” To adequately answer that question, I must evaluate what I see in the lives of the people in my congregations. Here are five observations of the people in my Church, and I think they reflect the greater Christian community I have experienced in the United States.

1. People are Busier Than Ever. A full schedule is the new normal everywhere, including rural communities. I think that there is a two-fold problem that the Church needs to address. First is to teach people the downside of their busyness. Second is to show them the value of using their time wisely and especially for God’s kingdom.
2. In a World Where People Have Tools to Connect More, They Actually Connect Less. Loneliness is becoming an epidemic in modern culture. Men appear to be struggling with this the most. There are several reasons for this, but the more significant issue is how to get all people to develop healthy relationships.
3. Children Are a Huge Priority, but Teens are Not. This one is becoming more and more pronounced the longer I work with teens. Have an event for little kids like VBS, and you can pack the house. Host an activity for teenagers and expect very little parent participation and a handful of teens. Parents are deeply invested in the lives of those children fifth grade and under and have little clue of the struggle’s teens are facing, and even worse, they are rarely being addressed.
4. Men Are Getting Spiritually Weaker. The divide between men and women in their faith seems to be growing wider. Once again, I think there are several reasons for this, but the solution is the bigger question. How do we get men to take their spiritual life seriously? Those who are trying to walk in faith need to be encouraged to lead in their home, Church, and community.
5. There Are More Available Resources, Yet People Know Less. There is an ever-increasing need to teach people the Bible. Not only do people have little Bible knowledge, but much of what they have is inaccurate or incomplete. How do the Church and its leadership help develop more and better disciples?

These are some of the things I am noticing that are shaping the culture of the community in which I live. Is there anything you would add to my list? These concepts will develop my upcoming sermons and leadership through 2020. How are they molding your life and family today?

While in college I carried a cassette tape in my car from Paul Simon. It was a collection of his greatest hits from 1971-1986 called “Negotiations and Love Songs.” The title was a line from his song “Train in the Distance,” where it says “negotiations and love songs are often mistaken for one and the same.” It is a great line that captures the pictures of two people trying to live together in agreement without the existence of love, and they don’t understand the difference.

Recently I was thinking about my prayer life, and a similar line went through my head, “negotiations and prayers are often mistaken for one and the same.” There is the possibility that when we address God, we are trying to get him to do our will. We barter and negotiate when we speak with our maker. We say things like, “God if you give me this, then I will do that.” Our words offer God our obedience in exchange for his omnipotence.

Prayer is about opening our heart up to God and his will. It is an opportunity for us to submit our lives to his leading. We present our needs to God and live with the expectation of him doing his mighty work.

One question I am now asking myself about my prayers is, “Am I seeking God’s will or mine?” Am I trying to negotiate with God instead of offering my prayers? Negotiations and prayers are not one and the same.

Recently I preached a sermon that was a home run. I don’t usually think that way about my sermons as I often teeter between self-loathing and suicidal thoughts in the time after I finish a message. This one was different; it was touching, and everyone agreed it was well delivered. Since I have spoken, there have been dozens of people make comments to me personally and online about how much they enjoyed it, and I must be honest; it scares me to death.

I know as a public speaker the goal is for people to listen and learn from your message while they enjoy your delivery. Being a preacher is a little different. In fact, it is more comfortable for me to deliver a sermon I think is lousy because I know I need God to show up and do something with it. When it goes well, there are other thoughts in my head.

1. I want God to get the glory not me. I am glad people liked my preaching, but if they only see me, then I messed up. I want them to hear about God and his will above my own. I often feel that a great sermon leaves people wanting more of God and not the preacher.
2. Forgetting the Holy Spirit. As a believer, I am convinced that the Holy Spirit of God is what makes preaching work. God takes my words and infuses them with his Spirit so that they touch the heart, mind, and soul of the listener.
3. It was only part of the overall experience. On this particular occasion, several other things happened before I got up to speak. Some songs put people into a mood, and a type of thinking was introduced. There was another speaker who laid the groundwork and the context of what I was going to say. There were also people who prayed before, during and after the event. I got to be the cherry on top of the bowl, the ice cream and the hot fudge.
4. Fear of remembering me and not the message. I am glad people liked what I had to say, but I hope a year from now they remember the passage of the Bible I presented and the essential content of what I had to say.
5. The temptation of my foolish pride. This one is the toughest for me. It feels good when people say nice things about you. Quickly my head begins to swell as people repeatedly praise my work. It is easy to think, “That is right; I am a special person.” Unfortunately, I made a couple of comments I regret in the time since the sermon that showed my prize oozing out. I am only as good as God allows me to be in every situation.

All of this may sound crazy to you, but as a preacher, this has been my struggle recently. I wish it were not true. I really would love to tell you that I am so spiritual that none of this influences me. I am thankful for everyone’s encouragement, and I am trying to learn how to handle it but know it does not come easily.

The pressure has been on high for the past five days. The family arrived, and we had three new people staying in our house. I delivered a Baccalaureate message on Wednesday night. There was a graduation party at our home complete with a meal. We had to set up and then clean up from the same party. We had worship on Sunday morning which included an emphasis on Mother’s Day. Not only was it Mother’s Day, but it was also my mother’s birthday and graduation Sunday. My son gave the Salutatorian speech, and I am not sure if he or I was more nervous. The evening was spent organizing pictures and finalizing the weekend. Finally this morning some of the family left, and I am back in the office for another week of work.

I sit here this morning semi-exhausted and yet full. It has been a great weekend. My sermon went well, and everyone was complimentary. The party was excellent, and we are blessed to have the love and support of so many wonderful people. His speech went great, and everyone had good things to say. We have numerous pictures that make me smile from my son and my family. It was a weekend full of blessing.

One image has often crossed my mind, “What does an Olympic competitor do the day after the competition is over?” Think about it; you have trained for four years in every way for that one big event, and then it is over. What do they do the next day? Do they rest? Do they cry? Do they go back to the gym?

Today I go back to the gym. I have more sermons to write and another son to lead toward graduation. For a few minutes, I want to linger in my mind and think about the last few days. I am a truly blessed man. I have a loving family with an outstanding wife and good boys. I have a special mother. I am a part of a Church that supports and encourages me. Not only has it been a good weekend, but I have a good life. My friend likes to say, “I am too blessed to complain.”

I don’t have anything special to say today, other than this, be sure to take a few minutes regularly to notice all the positives in your life. The pressure of life is ever present but so are the blessings of God.

Occasionally I post something about my family when we are going through a significant life event. This weekend is one of those times. My third son is graduating from high school as salutatorian. His two older brothers finished third in their class, and Dakota made the top two.

Today I want to write a little bit about my son even though you may not know him or care.

1. He is the Mini-Me. When he was little, I would shave once a year, and the resemblance is uncanny. We have many of the same facial features. The more surprising part is that we saw a picture of my dad when he was 16 in a basketball photo. You would not have been able to tell the two apart. He has the Harris’ face. Not only do we bare a similar look, but we also have the same sense of humor, enjoy the outdoors, like similar music and enjoy public speaking. My wife will also tell you that we are both talkers😊

2. He has a big heart to match his smile. He will never know the number of times I have stood back and watched quietly. Little kids will come up to him, and he will listen, and he will talk to them. I know that sometimes it has been challenging to be helpful, but he always tries to have a kind word. He is friendly and courteous as much as possible.

3. He has stretched every boundary. His mother and I have spent more nights worried about that boy. We have prayed for him and asked God to work on him and in him. I am thankful that the Lord put some Godly men in his life at a dark time to help pull him through. He has already learned the need for grace and goodness of God and other people.

4. He loves to laugh. In fact, it is tough to get him to take things seriously. He gets this from me. We both love to drink deep the joy of life and not get stressed over little things. We have enjoyed movies, TV shows, jokes, inside stories, and memes together. I can always count on my buddy for a laugh.

5. I am very proud of him. I hate the word pride because it implies that I did something well. In reality, God gave me this wonderful little boy to raise. It has been a roller coaster ride for over 18 years, and I am delighted with how he turned out. He will always be our Cuda or Coda bug.

This weekend he graduates, and it will be hard to hold back the tears. I am excited about the next chapter of his life, and I pray every day that God will do something powerful through his life. I know he has great things in store. I want the world to know how much I love my son and the joy this weekend gives me.

I love you Dakota

The story of Adam and Eve’s choice to disobey God in Genesis chapter three is a rich story filled with theological significance along with practical application. Upon my last reading of this story, I noticed something I had never seen before.

One of the first blunders in the story is easy to notice. Eve says in Genesis 3:3 “…but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’ ” Eve adds something that is never recorded from the mouth of God. She inserts the phrase, “and we must not touch it.” The rest of her quote is true, but for some reason, she distorts his words, not with an omission but rather an added phrase.

Then comes the part I had not noticed. The story continues in Genesis 3:6 “When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.”

Did you notice that three-word statement? She sees and understands the goodness of the fruit and then she took some. She pulled it off the tree and held it in her hand. Because of her distortion of God’s word, a subtle shift happens. If she thought she would die when she touched the fruit, then her faith was unfounded. She felt it, and nothing happened. If God was wrong about that simple first step, then he was probably wrong about everything. Her twisting of God’s word set her up for failure.

This reminds me of a passage Peter wrote to the Church where he says, “He (The Apostle Paul) writes the same way in all his letters, speaking in them of these matters. His letters contain some things that are hard to understand, which ignorant and unstable people distort, as they do the other Scriptures, to their own destruction. (2 Peter 3:16)” They distort the scripture, other translations say, “twist,” to their own destruction.

One tiny phase composed of six words is the set up for failure. God said I should not touch it and when I did nothing terrible happened immediately. The boundary line was blurred, and the next step was outside of the will of God. Sin entered the world and death came with sin, not just for Eve, but for all of humanity.

We must be cautious with how we handle our scriptures. We must use wisdom and careful study to understand them. Adding a single phase like, “God wants me happy” or, “I can’t change” can distort God’s plan and lead us down a path that ends in destruction.

Eve’s blunder was small in its presence but large in its scope. That is the way sin and temptation work. We must be alert and not fall prey to the schemes of the devil as she did. The pain is not always immediate, but it never fails to arrive.

Recently I was listening to an older sermon from Ozark Christian College chapel, and I heard a statement made by David Erikson. He said,

“Fear is faith in negative outcomes. To overcome our fears, we do not need to change the object of our fear, but rather the object of our faith.”

I hope I wrote that down exactly right. I listened to it a couple of times. It was a statement that I found insightful. Maybe today you need to hear these words, “God is bigger than whatever scares you.”

Most people I encounter have a tame view of Jesus. They picture him as a likable Mr. Rogers type character who has good intentions while he was friendly to everyone and overflowed with happiness. He didn’t judge people. He turned the other cheek. He healed everyone and left a wake of smiley happy people.

Unfortunately, that is not the Jesus of the Bible. The real Jesus as recorded in the gospel accounts was not always so nice. I am not going to reference every scripture, because you can do that, but let me share a few stories.

Jesus frequently opposed a group of individuals called Pharisees. He calls these guys hypocrites and whitewashed tombs. Neither of these names is a compliment. He made these guys so mad that they plotted to kill him. Once he confronted the money changers who worked with these people in the temple, he overturned their tables, and one account says he used a whip while driving them out.

We like and agree with many of these stories in principle. All of us hate religious charlatans who prey on the weak and emotionally vulnerable. If you want to write a best seller, then publish a book about the evils of Church leadership and how you hate them too.

This leaves us convinced that Jesus was only upset with the Pharisees but was kind to spiritual seekers. He was gentle with those who wished to follow him in an effort to have a more significant impact. Once again, the Bible does not paint us that picture of him. One woman comes to him and wants to be healed, and he calls her a dog. Another time a rich young ruler comes, and he tells him to sell everything he has and give it to the poor. Still yet, the crowds begin to swell and he proceeds to instruct them to take up their cross and follow him. In John, after he feeds a large group of people, he then preaches the sermon on the bread of life and everyone, but his twelve followers seem to leave. He continually calls out people for their weak commitment and his desire for fully devoted followers.

Well, okay a few times he comes off a little unhappy, but his teaching was full of love and grace. Not so fast. He told people that there is only one way to heaven. He frequently spoke in his parables about the coming judgment of God. Jesus actually said people that there was a real place called hell and some people would spend their eternity there.

Occasionally when I tell people about all of this, they tell me that this was just the way he appears in the gospels. After his death, burial and resurrection everything changes. If someone suggests that idea to me, then I encourage them to read the letters to the seven Church in the book of Revelation. Jesus tells the Churches that there is a group of people he hates. He actually seems more frustrated and demanding in these letters.

Here is my point: a nice friendly Jesus is easy to shape and mold. He likes the same things we do, and he doesn’t approve of the characteristics of which we do not agree. He does not require us or anyone we know to change. He affirms our self-righteous behavior and sin without question. Unfortunately, he is not the Jesus of the Bible.

Jesus desire is for all of us to live in a right relationship with God. Sometimes that means we have to hear the hard truth. Sometimes that means we need to change. Sometimes it feels like the surgeon is cutting us just to hurt us and not to heal.

Please don’t mishear me. I am not suggesting that Jesus followers need to be a group of mean, judgmental people. Christians are not to be angry all the time as we live with a continual sense of moral outrage. We do however need to be serious about what it means to follow Jesus. We need to be honest about what Jesus said. We are required to lead people into the change that the gospel demands. And sometimes this doesn’t come off as nice. I really wish it did.

Jesus desire for righteousness superseded his need to be nice all the time. Perhaps his followers need a different set of criteria to evaluate his work … and ours.